Best Head Instead.

It’s funny how I’ve been getting head since I turned 16, yet only gained the best dick-sucking experience EVER just last night. What makes it even funnier is the fact that I received my best blowjob, so far, from a hoe. Yep! A true hoe! Some may prefer the term ‘Prostitute’. Others might be more comfortable with the term ‘Love-peddler’. My local niggas in the yard would most certainly love to use the word ‘Ashawo’ but I prefer to stick to the three-letter one, ‘HOE’.

You know I recently had a low-key birthday celebration right? Well, a buddy of mine came in from Lagos aka ‘Lasgidi’ yesterday and upon hearing that he missed the small but fun get-together for three, he got both ‘charged’ and ‘enraged’ and decided to give me a special post-birthday celebration. To be frank as well, this was the first time I also ever had a post-birthday gig.

Anyway, all four of us headed out to a very popular pub not very far from our hostel. We arrived there at about 10:30pm to meet an unusually large turnout of fun-seekers. It was certainly an electrified atmospheric mix of music, booze and women. I observed some young men (who were obviously tipsy) getting up to shake to heavy beats blasting from the gigantic speakers located in strategic places while others just sat back and bopped their heads to it while sipping from their beer mugs. A good number of others were somewhere negotiating with them hoes while a few were struggling to maintain unnecessary conversations with friends.

We took our seats by the barbecue spot and my friend, Ziggy, who was his usual lively self, proved to be a good host. “Please serve us a bottle of Andre, a bottle of AK-47, four glasses and some ice” he told the barman who came to take our order. Shouts of “ZIGGY” then followed as the rest of us hailed him. “Make una no worry, because of Adebola I go spoil una tonight. All eye must tint by fire by force” he said with laughter and we couldn’t help but join him.

Ziggy also ordered two plates of ‘Asun’ (peppered chopped-up goat meat) for each of us and my mouth became swollen with appreciation, not knowing a special birthday present was still to come.

We had successfully emptied the bottle of Andre, which we popped first to mark the reason why we were there and were slowly sipping the AK-47 when my able host announced he would be giving us a final treat before we headed back to the hostel.

“Guys, how about complimentary ‘lamba’?” Ziggy began. “Make we arrange some of these gurls them for some fun nau? Abi una no go like fuck? Make una go pick anyone of una choice. I go pay am im money and pay for room sef. How una see am naa?”

Because we were tipsy (well, I was for sure) the chant of “Ziggy” was extremely louder than the first and everyone smiled in excitement….except me.

“Em..Ziggy, me I nor go fit represent for this one o!” I said with much worry.

“Ahn-ahn! Bros, wetin happen nau? Na because of you I even make the suggestion sef. As we don chop birthday chow, drink birthday drink, na only birthday fuck remain naa! Abi you no sabi dat song again? He said singing ‘Birthday Sex’ by Jeremih.

“Ehn..I sabi am nau. Na just say me nor dey do ashy tinz” I said and got contemptuous looks from the others.

“Guy, forget dat tin! Na one day person dey start to do something. After all, na one day we sef start to dey fuck ashana naa! Abi men, no be so?” “Na so o!” came chorused by the others.

Ziggy then continued “Yes o! Debola, na tonight you go first fuck ashana and na me go pay for your fuck” he said grinning. “No fear. Dem nor dey bite and we all go use condom. Oya, since na you get birthday, na you go pick girl first before us. Go pick make you shine ya eye well-well o!”

I first hesitated but watching the others cheer me on, coupled with the alcohol in my system, I braved it and got up with them to go to where the hoes gathered like chickens waiting to be fed not sweet corn but quick cock. “Broda, broda, pick me! I go do you well. Try me and you go see. I sabi suck well-well” were the welcome greetings that we received from the bitches.

My friends, including Ziggy made no move yet and encouraged me to go on and make my pick. After much hesitation, I eventually settled for a hoe named Ella (I doubt that’s her real name though) and my cohorts followed suit and quickly selected their own three from a gang of many. After much bargaining, we settled for N2000 as the fee to be paid for the ‘Short-time’ option.

As we led our companions to where we could pay for rooms, I discovered that each of us had strikingly different tastes in our choices. Ziggy picked a tall and skinny hoe with large boobs and a flat arse. My two other friends chose big, round and thick hoes whose boobs competed stiffly with their tummies in some sort of race. They had big, round backsides too and the only thing that differentiated them was their complexion as one was quite dark while the other was albino fair (she don bleach skin die). As for me, Ella was a slim, averagely-tall ebony chick with medium-sized boobs and arse.

Ziggy quickly settled the young man in charge of the rooms and gave us each a key. Laughing while squeezing the nyash of his pick, he said “Oya naa! Guys, let’s catch our fun and go back to the hostel. Sharp-sharp tinz!”. My two other pals responded with “Correct! Ziggy, you get mouth” before we went into our separate rooms.

Inside my room, I watched Ella take out a condom from her handbag and throw it on the bed. She was just about to take off her skimpy skirt when I surprised her.

“No! Please don’t do that. I really don’t want to fuck”. I said

“Ehn? You no wan fuck? Why you kon carry me enter here then?”

I felt stupid as I replied with “No mind me jare. Na my padi talk say I must fuck by force”

(Laughing) “Na wa o! Na your padi talk say….Shey im wan force you fuck ni? Abi wetin? Anyway, you suppose fuck o ‘cos as you know, im don already pay me.”

“I know. Na just say I no feel like fucking”.

“You no feel like fucking abi you no wan fuck ashawo?” she asked me sternly

Feeling embarrassed, I looked at her shyly and said “I no just wan fuck, simple”

“Hian! If I hear! Abegi joor! You just no wan fuck me because I be ashawo. Forget o! Me sef get my own level. As you dey see me so, I dey fuck big men for government secretariat.” She smiled and I wondered if that was actually an achievement.

“Anyway” Ella continued, “As you no kon wan fuck now, make I begin dey go. Thank you for the free money”. As she made for the door, I grabbed her hand.

“Ah! Wait nau! You wan make my guy vex for me ni? Stay with me here small so im nor go know say I no do anything” I said pleadingly.

“Oho! So you sef don realise say you wan troway im money shey?”

“No be so nau. I bin no ask am to pay for fuck for me. Im just dey insist say im must celebrate my birthday with sex”.

Ella’s eyes suddenly widened at the sound of ‘birthday’. “Birthday? Today na your birthday ni?”

“No. actually na on Saturday. Na just because say im nor dey around on dat day, na im make am carry us come here today”.

Her eyes further became enlarged at what I disclosed. “Wait o! You mean say your birthday na yesterday…yesterday the 18th?”

“Yeah!” I was just about to quickly add “Why you ask” when Ella suddenly rushed at me with a hug. “Ah! You be my birthday mate o! Hmmnn….See o! yesterday na my birthday too….The hug became tighter and I struggled for a second to breathe.

“Really? That’s nice o!” I said. “Happy birthday in arrears”

(Blushing now)…”Thank you. I wish you the same. I for give you better birthday fucking now if no be say you just no wan fuck. Abi you go gree make I suck you? At least that one no be big deal naa!”

I thought about it for a moment and came to a conclusion that though I couldn’t bring myself to fuck a love-peddler, getting head from one truly wasn’t a big deal. Afterall it was just dick-sucking. “Okay! No wahala” I told her.

My response must have gotten Ella fired up for she suddenly grinned and said “Correct! I go give you the ELLA SPECIAL. No worry, you go enjoy am well-well.”

I was turned-on by the way that Ella looked at me now and ‘Mr. Peniscillin’ was already hard for her when she moved close to me and unzipped my fly.

“Ooh! See as your kini long o! No be small tin. E kon slim join like snake” she said while laughing and giving me a hand job.

I blushed again and tried to think of an appropriate response when Ella killed me with the best blowjob I’ve ever received. Dropping down, though not completely, Ella assumed an awkward squatting position before taking my cock full into her mouth. It was when she reached for my nipples under my T-shirt that she completed her ‘killer-move’.

Boy, was I blown away! I swear the feeling of ‘head’ this way was different. The combination of my cock in her mouth and her warm fingers rubbing and twitching my nipples was CRAZZZYYYY!. I had never for once experienced anything like that before. It’s not like I’ve never gotten head from a bitch with ‘no hands’. It was just the sheer combination of her squatting position (not kneeling down), no-hands on the dick and nipples teasing that drove me insane.

I moaned like a girl, much to my embarrassment and Ella enjoyed making me do that as she continuously glanced at my face from time to time to make sure that she was doing me right.

After some hard, skilful sucking for about 2 minutes, I exploded in her mouth and was surprised to see her swallow my cum. Every single drop.

“Mmm….that was salty” she said and giggled.

“I know. That’s how it’s meant to be (I’ve tasted my cum before).

I patted her head in appreciation, pulled my trousers back up and zipped up before Ella and I left the room to join the others who were already waiting in the lobby.