Folks who know me very well know I rep #TeamPerv to tha fullest. Why, it’s the greatest team on Twitter!…WORD! And I don’t care what any tweep outside my beloved team says but I’m TBP and sticking with #TeamPerv for life!...GBAM!
In truth, there’s truly nothing I love more than deep, sexual, perverted talk (besides the actual act of sex anyway) and my fellow #TeamPerv mates never fail to impress me. Though I hardly find the time to tweet at them and relate like I should, my spirits always get lifted each time I read and digest their tweets and interactions amongst themselves. I sure do hope they understand that though I rarely join their conversations, I love ‘em all and they remain my one, true family on the cool social network.
Speaking of my #TwitterFam now, I’ve got lots of them: The straight ones, the bi-sexual ones, the gay ones and the confused ones….lolz. Trust me, I know exactly what I’m talking about.
Oh yeah! I also got a special #TwitterFam; She’sAllSmiles based in Canada but the truth is, she really doesn’t like to be associated with the team (even when I know she is truly one of us despite her failing to admit it) but that don’t matter. What matters is that she loves and supports me however she can and I’m grateful for it.
Other than this special family member, the rest of my #TeamPerv mates are quite plain, simple and open about their feelings, intentions and sexuality. Like me, they just wanna talk dirty, set P, fuck and have their fun all the damn fucking time. That’s how it should be and that’s how it is with us.
Of all my #TeamPerv mates, the tweep who amazes me the most is Tha Perv Rocker. Mayne, that tweep can talk nonsense for Africa. Choi! His tweets are more often than not, a cool mixture of sex and humour and this is why he remains top on my list. I usually find myself doffing my hat for him whenever I find his tweets on my timeline.
I also got my personal padis – KonjiBoiTwit and PervyByNature whose tweets get me chuckling from time to time, when I do come across them. These tweeps be awesome I tell ya!
There’s also CertifiedPerv who is a friend beyond Twitter and who encourages me to keep on writing (which I intend to do anyway). He once told me my posts entertain him and you bet my medium-sized head swelled at that remark. Speaking of encouragement, I would kill myself if I didn’t mention the tweep, iTweetWord. Mayne, that nigga is one good and supportive fella. When we first met on Twitter, he told me I had become his best friend after reading only one of my blogposts. Ever since, he’s been doing his best in promoting me; absolutely for FREE! Can you imagine that shit??? That nigga kind as fuck! The whole promotion thing is what my new friend and #NamesakeOfLife, Debola aka _Kreamz is equally trying to do now. I believe he also digs my posts because he never fails to recommend my blog to anyone he comes across in need of some sexual entertainment. I’m grateful to him as well. Much gratitude goes to 7footplus, PussyBob, Opatunde, and tobyt007 too for being cool perv bros.
There are other fantastic perv-mates of course, just that all their names/handles don’t easily and readily come to mind. They should please pardon me for not including their names on this post. It don’t change the fact that we’re still family.
Ah yes! Believe it or not but I we also got female pervs in the house. Oh yes! I’m talking about hot and sexy females repping #TeamPerv. There’s my special Slutty Nurse, SexyNorma2 who treats me whenever I’m sick….lolz and who inspired and encouraged me to come up with one of my best posts so far. I’d say we made up that post together sha and she’s so awesome. There’s also FoxyVivica1983, who happens to be KonjiBoi’s gurlfriend and I wish them pure blissful sex always. Mmmm….there’s PrettyDerbie as well and Oh my! There are many other female members whose handles I honestly can’t remember this minute and I do beg their forgiveness. #TeamPerv is just one BIG perverted family mehn! No doubt!
Uhun! I just remembered that there are other tweeps who are not necessarily #TeamPerv mates but are friends of That Bloody Pervert. Talking about Stypella, Opixxy, GA_Mula, GeorgeAkiojano, Lamzi1, Kozlatosh and a host of others. They rarely tweet the kind of stuff that I’m down with but they appreciate and support me so that sorta makes them family as well….but not on the #TeamPerv level sha!....Lolz.
Anyway, you probably didn’t know this but I’ma tell you right now. I’m currently faded on Legend Extra Stout so please, kindly forgive me if you are a #TeamPerv mate; we are following each other on Twitter and I still failed to mention you. It wasn’t intentional I swear. Please don’t hate me. I love y’all!....#NoHomo to the guys please.
Since this is supposed to me my toast to you guys as I continue to sip from my glass cup, I want y’all to know that I’ll be down with y’all forever ‘cos I’m #TeamPerv for life! Tweeps outside our team don’t know us...they don’t understand us and they may be quick to judge us but I’ma use one of Westlife’s songs in making them understand that we are PROUDLY PERVERTS. Here it goes…………………….
Every Perv is looking for that something
That something that makes it all complete
We find it in the Private Places…………Places they fear and refuse to see
Some of us find it between the legs of young children
Others find it between their girlfriends’ thighs
But we can’t deny the joy it brings………when we find that special thing…
WE’RE FLYING WITHOUT WINGS !!!
Know the song???...........Hehehehe…………………
God bless you #TeamPerv mates!.........& Long Live #TeamPerv !!!
Yours truly,
That Bloody Pervert
Saturday, January 26, 2013
TBP’s Diary 26/01/2013 (Last Diary Confession I Guess)
Dear Diary,
I’m afraid today didn’t begin well because my older brother prevented me from carrying-out my daily exercise on Mr. P with some good sweet wanking. Not that he told me not to do so or anything. He just appeared to be in the same room with me because he paid me a visit last night and slept over. There was certainly no way I could have stroked myself with him on the same bed you know?? When I’m not like #Oomf….*lips sealed*. That dude is just something else!
Anyway, be rest assured I attended to Mr. P’s needs as soon as my bro left later this morning. I did so with some festish porn starring Kelly Madison. You know her right? She’s the pretty white lady with the big jugs. She’s been featuring in pornflicks since I discovered the realm of pornography and I wonder just how many cocks have actually been inside her…..Very PLENTY I think!.........*sigh*
Anyway, something amusing happened when I took my bro out to eat at a local restaurant not far from my new crib. I met a new perv repping #TeamPerv (Local), Challenge Division…Lolz. The guy’s a local #TeamPerv mate because he don’t know nothing about speaking English. He spoke only pure, raw and thick Yoruba throughout the time that my brother and I spent there eating rice, dodo with beef and pure water.
This nigga, while brother and I forked our food, kept telling the owner of the canteen; who was obviously from Ibadan by her accent that he had no money on him to pay for the meal he was eating but that…..WAIT FOR IT….but that he was willing to pay in kind. Can you believe that shit??? His words – “Ewo, emi o lowo lowo o! Se ema gba kin sanwo ninu ile?”…meaning “Look, I don’t have money on me o! Will you allow me pay you inside your house?” Shiiiiidddd….That guy was obviously charming in a razz way because much to my distaste, he kept the woman blushing and smiling like an idiot. She didn’t respond or even seem upset one bit by her customer’s comments and I suspected that the guy had most likely pounded her pussy before. I mean, shit only seemed logical and made sense that way. You can’t talk sexual nonsense to a female without a negative reaction unless if she secretly wants you to lay her or you’ve already laid her. That’s my opinion. Plus when this dude was done eating, he kept saying “Oya, eje ka wole ninu yara kin sanwo mi”…meaning “Let’s go into your room so that I can pay for my meal”. Mayne, that guy sure had guts boasting in front of us strangers about his familiarity with madam’s vagina. Anyway, I must confess I was truly entertained throughout my brief period eating there even though no one actually went into any room to do ‘that thing’.
Now, Dear Diary, I hope you’re not upset about the bracket part of my post title? Please don’t be. When I created you, I had in mind an avenue to update my blog on a daily basis. However, this diary thing ain’t really working for me. As in…I’m not just feeling it. I’m so so sorry. I gotta quit you now and go back to telling my regular sexual stories. I think I’ll be contented with having a proper story here on a weekly basis at the least than some personal mumbo-jumbo everyday, which just might bore my readers. Please understand and don’t be offended. Who knows, we just might get to relate again. Goodbye ehn? Till whenever!
Yours truly,
That Bloody Pervert
I’m afraid today didn’t begin well because my older brother prevented me from carrying-out my daily exercise on Mr. P with some good sweet wanking. Not that he told me not to do so or anything. He just appeared to be in the same room with me because he paid me a visit last night and slept over. There was certainly no way I could have stroked myself with him on the same bed you know?? When I’m not like #Oomf….*lips sealed*. That dude is just something else!
Anyway, be rest assured I attended to Mr. P’s needs as soon as my bro left later this morning. I did so with some festish porn starring Kelly Madison. You know her right? She’s the pretty white lady with the big jugs. She’s been featuring in pornflicks since I discovered the realm of pornography and I wonder just how many cocks have actually been inside her…..Very PLENTY I think!.........*sigh*
Anyway, something amusing happened when I took my bro out to eat at a local restaurant not far from my new crib. I met a new perv repping #TeamPerv (Local), Challenge Division…Lolz. The guy’s a local #TeamPerv mate because he don’t know nothing about speaking English. He spoke only pure, raw and thick Yoruba throughout the time that my brother and I spent there eating rice, dodo with beef and pure water.
This nigga, while brother and I forked our food, kept telling the owner of the canteen; who was obviously from Ibadan by her accent that he had no money on him to pay for the meal he was eating but that…..WAIT FOR IT….but that he was willing to pay in kind. Can you believe that shit??? His words – “Ewo, emi o lowo lowo o! Se ema gba kin sanwo ninu ile?”…meaning “Look, I don’t have money on me o! Will you allow me pay you inside your house?” Shiiiiidddd….That guy was obviously charming in a razz way because much to my distaste, he kept the woman blushing and smiling like an idiot. She didn’t respond or even seem upset one bit by her customer’s comments and I suspected that the guy had most likely pounded her pussy before. I mean, shit only seemed logical and made sense that way. You can’t talk sexual nonsense to a female without a negative reaction unless if she secretly wants you to lay her or you’ve already laid her. That’s my opinion. Plus when this dude was done eating, he kept saying “Oya, eje ka wole ninu yara kin sanwo mi”…meaning “Let’s go into your room so that I can pay for my meal”. Mayne, that guy sure had guts boasting in front of us strangers about his familiarity with madam’s vagina. Anyway, I must confess I was truly entertained throughout my brief period eating there even though no one actually went into any room to do ‘that thing’.
Now, Dear Diary, I hope you’re not upset about the bracket part of my post title? Please don’t be. When I created you, I had in mind an avenue to update my blog on a daily basis. However, this diary thing ain’t really working for me. As in…I’m not just feeling it. I’m so so sorry. I gotta quit you now and go back to telling my regular sexual stories. I think I’ll be contented with having a proper story here on a weekly basis at the least than some personal mumbo-jumbo everyday, which just might bore my readers. Please understand and don’t be offended. Who knows, we just might get to relate again. Goodbye ehn? Till whenever!
Yours truly,
That Bloody Pervert
Friday, January 25, 2013
TBP’s Diary 25/01/2013
Dear Diary,
Welcome to my world; my blog and private life. I have decided to create you not just because I need to update this blog of mine frequently but because I also need someone to share my daily perverted thoughts and sexual experiences with. I need someone who will listen without questioning or judging me and someone who will remain with me till the day I hit six feet under. I reckon you fit the bill, SO THERE!
Dear Diary, you already know who I am and what I stand for so I’ll just go ahead and share with you. I feel very glad and relieved having finished the ‘Yori-Yori’ story. Mayne, that shit took longer than expected to complete but I’m glad it’s finally on here now. You know I’ve been very distracted lately right??? Yeah, you know! You know I had to change my residence and finding a suitable crib plus moving out wasn’t a bit easy. Anyway, I’m all fully settled now (I think) and I hope to find more free time to actually type my stories and thoughts as well as blog about them.
Speaking of my blogposts, Dear Diary please help me beg all #TeamPerv mates and friends of That Bloody Pervert o! I haven’t been in touch with them lately and I fear that they would be thinking that I’m now pompous and forming celeb for them. You kuku know every aspa what I’ve been going through lately, shey? You know I hardly have time to tweet as much as I used to due to that ‘thing’…..that thing that is still having me search for the true meaning of my existence here on earth…..*shaking my head*
Anyway, I still remain assured and positive that ‘e go beta’. Since my program is still on suspension at LCU and Splash FM refused to accept me, I must continue to have faith that one day, I will break bread with this blog of mine. I will make it as an infamous sex blogger. I don’t fucking care how long it takes so long as it does happen someday.
But talking about Splash now, chai! E pain me wella o! I truly had high hopes for that station. I concluded I would be taken since I am sure I did well in both the oral and written tests. I truly wanted a career in broadcasting but I am not sure I still want that anymore. Hmmnn…..Man proposes, God disposes. Maybe, I should just keep on blogging everyday till the publisher of an erotic magazine contacts me with a juicy contract and then I can ‘hammer’. Oh that would be so nice ‘cos there’s nothing I love more than writing about sex talk…...*perv grin*
I still recall how the interview went though. I arrived at the station looking dashing in T.Rex’s black blazer on my grey shirt and black pair of trousers. I was certain everyone noticed me when I walked into the waiting room not just because of my looks or my scent but because of my confidence. I acted like I had already gotten the job and as if confirming my optimism, one pretty female and fellow applicant instantly began ‘famzing’ with me. Such a pretty thing she was with her bright, fair skin tone, long legs and pointy chest. She had a white smile too and I paid her all the attention I could manage. I knew that if we were both taken; amongst the 11 others, she would be the first employee that I would fuck silly…NO DOUBT! I had some intuition that her punana would be tight as fuck when I eventually got to beat it. Anyway, I guess she’s lucky now. Afterall I didn’t get in….despite the interviewers showing genuine interest in my personal life, work experience and responses to their entertaining questions……*shaking my head*….and I still didn’t get the job. Fuck Splash mayne! I don’t give a fuck about her no more. She had just berra keep doing her thang and repping Ibadan. And I certainly wish her luck in competing with Beat 97.9 FM. Gonna be some tough shit I tell ya!
Truth is, apart from this pretty female applicant, whom I ‘famzed’ with, the other female employees didn’t seem sexually appealing to me. They were all either too fat, too short or wearing super-heavy make-up on that particular Friday. I recall that one of them messed up her gorgeous face with a big, fat, sagging pair of buttocks that made me shake my head for a good three minutes. I guess all that make-up was for the photo-shoot which they had just before I left the office. Tis all good though but I’m sure that if I was indeed accepted, none of them gurls would ever get to see, feel, lick or fuck Mr. P…THAT’S FOR SURE!
Hmmnnn……But now I’m thinking….Do you think Splash ran some underground check on me and discovered I am TBP? I’m now thinking is quite possible that they discovered I bear @Peniscillin on Twitter, where I talk about nothing but sex, sex, SEX! However, that shouldn’t be enough reason to disqualify me naa! HIAN!!! I ain’t quitting this blog for nobody I SWEAR! I’m gon’ remain TBP for LIFE!!!
Anyway, guess what happened to me this evening? *chuckle*…I’ll tell you. You know Nigeria played against Zambia right??? Well, because I felt like sipping my brand; Legend Extra Stout while enjoying the game, I decided to visit the same pub that I’ve patronised four times already now and deny myself the comfort of watching the match on my DSTV Walka at home. This decision paid off though because…..*laughs*….because, I SAW THINGS!....Lolz…..
Just after Mikel foolishly threw away a priceless penalty, two young ladies with deep Oyo facial marks waltzed in and sat close to me. One of them turned her glance at me into a stare and ordinarily, I would have instantly felt uneasy but for my kind bottle of Legend, which kept me calm and steady. I guess she was feeling the boy and wondering why I was sitting all by myself. That was my business not hers anyway and after one quick look at them, I rushed into the assumption that they were local chicks from the neighbourhood.
Two minutes later, my suspicion was confirmed when the waiter approached them to take their orders. One of them ordered for 33 lager beer while the other called for Trophy beer. I was dazed on my seat and was like WHAT THE FUCK??? Chicks drinking 33 and Trophy??? PUEH!!! I mean, I can tolerate chicks drinking small stout or Smirnoff or Snapp or even Gordon Spark (if that shit still even exists) but certainly not that kind of beer. I just didn’t find such befitting enough for the womenfolk.
While I sipped my black stuff, I caught the one who gave me an earlier stare throwing more glances my way. She even entertained me with some thigh claps. You know what I mean right? That thing women do when they get agitated, restless or excited by opening and closing their thighs continuously for a period of time??? Yeah, that’s it! Each time I see chicks do that, I usually sing along in my head saying “Oya Shina Rambo open and close! Open and close! Close o!....Open and close! Open o!...Open and close!”…lolz. I think that’s Sir Shina Peters’ song.
So you bet that with these thigh-claps of hers, I got to see her panty. It was light-blue but I wasn’t impressed because it looked faded and cheap. When she later began stroking her partner’s thighs as well, I concluded again that they were just local lesbian/bisexual hoes looking for a guy to chat them up, pay for their drinks and take them home for some local fucking. Not me though….Nah!...Not me and I guess I disappointed them by leaving immediately Zambia equalised. Such a shame our Super Chickens couldn’t help but draw that match.
Oh yeah! Before I forget, I reconnected with some of my #TeamPerv mates on Twitter today and also got a new follower. My dearest @SexyNorma2 also requested that I stop by her hospital tomorrow for some sweet jabs. I’m supposed to also not wear boxer shorts so I know tomorrow will be a fun day………*perv grin*. I really wish I could relate with them more and get to know them better. Truth is, it’s now kinda difficult tweeting as much as I used to when I was still a newbie and hungry for attention. I know someday though, I’ll resolve that and get to do so. Kindly also help me thank my namesake; Adebola aka @_Kreamz for promoting me for free. That nigga be a true #NamesakeOfLife, I tell ya. He cool! Oh shit! How could I possibly forget??? *slaps self*....I really should be thanking ma boss, the Oracle too. I’m highly indebted to him and I’m not sure when and if I will actually be able to clear all my ‘gbese’. So help me God!
*Yawns*…..I gotta rest my perverted fingers now. Sleep calling. Talk to you tomorrow. Bye-bye!
Yours truly,
That Bloody Pervert
Welcome to my world; my blog and private life. I have decided to create you not just because I need to update this blog of mine frequently but because I also need someone to share my daily perverted thoughts and sexual experiences with. I need someone who will listen without questioning or judging me and someone who will remain with me till the day I hit six feet under. I reckon you fit the bill, SO THERE!
Dear Diary, you already know who I am and what I stand for so I’ll just go ahead and share with you. I feel very glad and relieved having finished the ‘Yori-Yori’ story. Mayne, that shit took longer than expected to complete but I’m glad it’s finally on here now. You know I’ve been very distracted lately right??? Yeah, you know! You know I had to change my residence and finding a suitable crib plus moving out wasn’t a bit easy. Anyway, I’m all fully settled now (I think) and I hope to find more free time to actually type my stories and thoughts as well as blog about them.
Speaking of my blogposts, Dear Diary please help me beg all #TeamPerv mates and friends of That Bloody Pervert o! I haven’t been in touch with them lately and I fear that they would be thinking that I’m now pompous and forming celeb for them. You kuku know every aspa what I’ve been going through lately, shey? You know I hardly have time to tweet as much as I used to due to that ‘thing’…..that thing that is still having me search for the true meaning of my existence here on earth…..*shaking my head*
Anyway, I still remain assured and positive that ‘e go beta’. Since my program is still on suspension at LCU and Splash FM refused to accept me, I must continue to have faith that one day, I will break bread with this blog of mine. I will make it as an infamous sex blogger. I don’t fucking care how long it takes so long as it does happen someday.
But talking about Splash now, chai! E pain me wella o! I truly had high hopes for that station. I concluded I would be taken since I am sure I did well in both the oral and written tests. I truly wanted a career in broadcasting but I am not sure I still want that anymore. Hmmnn…..Man proposes, God disposes. Maybe, I should just keep on blogging everyday till the publisher of an erotic magazine contacts me with a juicy contract and then I can ‘hammer’. Oh that would be so nice ‘cos there’s nothing I love more than writing about sex talk…...*perv grin*
I still recall how the interview went though. I arrived at the station looking dashing in T.Rex’s black blazer on my grey shirt and black pair of trousers. I was certain everyone noticed me when I walked into the waiting room not just because of my looks or my scent but because of my confidence. I acted like I had already gotten the job and as if confirming my optimism, one pretty female and fellow applicant instantly began ‘famzing’ with me. Such a pretty thing she was with her bright, fair skin tone, long legs and pointy chest. She had a white smile too and I paid her all the attention I could manage. I knew that if we were both taken; amongst the 11 others, she would be the first employee that I would fuck silly…NO DOUBT! I had some intuition that her punana would be tight as fuck when I eventually got to beat it. Anyway, I guess she’s lucky now. Afterall I didn’t get in….despite the interviewers showing genuine interest in my personal life, work experience and responses to their entertaining questions……*shaking my head*….and I still didn’t get the job. Fuck Splash mayne! I don’t give a fuck about her no more. She had just berra keep doing her thang and repping Ibadan. And I certainly wish her luck in competing with Beat 97.9 FM. Gonna be some tough shit I tell ya!
Truth is, apart from this pretty female applicant, whom I ‘famzed’ with, the other female employees didn’t seem sexually appealing to me. They were all either too fat, too short or wearing super-heavy make-up on that particular Friday. I recall that one of them messed up her gorgeous face with a big, fat, sagging pair of buttocks that made me shake my head for a good three minutes. I guess all that make-up was for the photo-shoot which they had just before I left the office. Tis all good though but I’m sure that if I was indeed accepted, none of them gurls would ever get to see, feel, lick or fuck Mr. P…THAT’S FOR SURE!
Hmmnnn……But now I’m thinking….Do you think Splash ran some underground check on me and discovered I am TBP? I’m now thinking is quite possible that they discovered I bear @Peniscillin on Twitter, where I talk about nothing but sex, sex, SEX! However, that shouldn’t be enough reason to disqualify me naa! HIAN!!! I ain’t quitting this blog for nobody I SWEAR! I’m gon’ remain TBP for LIFE!!!
Anyway, guess what happened to me this evening? *chuckle*…I’ll tell you. You know Nigeria played against Zambia right??? Well, because I felt like sipping my brand; Legend Extra Stout while enjoying the game, I decided to visit the same pub that I’ve patronised four times already now and deny myself the comfort of watching the match on my DSTV Walka at home. This decision paid off though because…..*laughs*….because, I SAW THINGS!....Lolz…..
Just after Mikel foolishly threw away a priceless penalty, two young ladies with deep Oyo facial marks waltzed in and sat close to me. One of them turned her glance at me into a stare and ordinarily, I would have instantly felt uneasy but for my kind bottle of Legend, which kept me calm and steady. I guess she was feeling the boy and wondering why I was sitting all by myself. That was my business not hers anyway and after one quick look at them, I rushed into the assumption that they were local chicks from the neighbourhood.
Two minutes later, my suspicion was confirmed when the waiter approached them to take their orders. One of them ordered for 33 lager beer while the other called for Trophy beer. I was dazed on my seat and was like WHAT THE FUCK??? Chicks drinking 33 and Trophy??? PUEH!!! I mean, I can tolerate chicks drinking small stout or Smirnoff or Snapp or even Gordon Spark (if that shit still even exists) but certainly not that kind of beer. I just didn’t find such befitting enough for the womenfolk.
While I sipped my black stuff, I caught the one who gave me an earlier stare throwing more glances my way. She even entertained me with some thigh claps. You know what I mean right? That thing women do when they get agitated, restless or excited by opening and closing their thighs continuously for a period of time??? Yeah, that’s it! Each time I see chicks do that, I usually sing along in my head saying “Oya Shina Rambo open and close! Open and close! Close o!....Open and close! Open o!...Open and close!”…lolz. I think that’s Sir Shina Peters’ song.
So you bet that with these thigh-claps of hers, I got to see her panty. It was light-blue but I wasn’t impressed because it looked faded and cheap. When she later began stroking her partner’s thighs as well, I concluded again that they were just local lesbian/bisexual hoes looking for a guy to chat them up, pay for their drinks and take them home for some local fucking. Not me though….Nah!...Not me and I guess I disappointed them by leaving immediately Zambia equalised. Such a shame our Super Chickens couldn’t help but draw that match.
Oh yeah! Before I forget, I reconnected with some of my #TeamPerv mates on Twitter today and also got a new follower. My dearest @SexyNorma2 also requested that I stop by her hospital tomorrow for some sweet jabs. I’m supposed to also not wear boxer shorts so I know tomorrow will be a fun day………*perv grin*. I really wish I could relate with them more and get to know them better. Truth is, it’s now kinda difficult tweeting as much as I used to when I was still a newbie and hungry for attention. I know someday though, I’ll resolve that and get to do so. Kindly also help me thank my namesake; Adebola aka @_Kreamz for promoting me for free. That nigga be a true #NamesakeOfLife, I tell ya. He cool! Oh shit! How could I possibly forget??? *slaps self*....I really should be thanking ma boss, the Oracle too. I’m highly indebted to him and I’m not sure when and if I will actually be able to clear all my ‘gbese’. So help me God!
*Yawns*…..I gotta rest my perverted fingers now. Sleep calling. Talk to you tomorrow. Bye-bye!
Yours truly,
That Bloody Pervert
Thursday, January 24, 2013
My Yori-Yori
Once upon a time and back in secondary school, there was a girl in my class whom I called my ‘Yori-Yori’. I was in JSS 3 back then and it was a time when all the boys had just learnt about puberty and its amazing results on the human body. We had all awaited with keen interest, such a development and closely monitored every single girl in that class of ours to see who the spirit of puberty would touch first. We paid undivided attention to the girls because according to our biology teacher, it was the females who felt the wind of puberty first; who felt that cool wind blow right across them to leave them looking and feeling like the ‘Naija’ version of transformers with new curves, lumps, hair and blood in peculiar places.
The teacher had asked us all our ages once and declared that either before the end of the term or at the beginning of the new term, we would all have attained puberty; the girls going first of course. That was his prediction. He also said we boys had to wait for a few more months after the girls had fully gone through that cycle to experience ours.
Now, thinking about it all over again, I really don’t know what our craze about puberty was all about at the time but I guess it was because it had something to do with bigger boobs, bush on the punana, and the accompanying awesome feeling of horniness. I mean, these were signs all the boys wanted to see; especially me who was still a young budding pervert at the time…lolz. I was already used to seeing animated bushfull vaginas on the pages of ‘Nackson’ magazine and I wanted to see what a real feminine bush looked like. (I know what you’re thinking now. Though I was a young pervert, I was still only hooked to Nackson. No Tickles, No Better Lover; No video PORN yet) Thank you!
So anyway, you can imagine our great disappointment when day after day till the last day of the term, we checked-out our female counterparts’ chests every morning in class but found no sign of improvement or development. We literally visited them; stood in front of their desks and stared at their chests while pretending to be talking to them to see if we could sight some sweet new lumps of mammary matter that we could beg to suck in exchange for a pack of cornflakes or a tin of Milo but ended up discovering nothing. It killed us inside and we began to doubt that biology teacher of ours. We thought maybe he predicted wrongly because he really didn’t know his onions. However, we were indeed the ones who eventually turned out to be wrong.
All the boys of JSS 3D went home disappointed from school for the holiday at the end of the term. We were all dejected because none of us could boast of any sweet tale to share with friends at home about sucking on some freshly-made puberty breasts. We felt our holiday would be boring and we really didn’t look forward to any holiday fun. We had hoped for some titty fun and we got none. It was like our dreams and aspirations had suddenly crashed and come to an end.
Things took an amazing turn however at the beginning of the new term……well not for all of us sha; I won’t lie. What happened was that our class finally got to witness the existence of puberty. YAY!!! The only sad thing about the whole thing was that it happened to ONLY one girl first, LONG BEFORE the other girls experienced such bodily change.
Now Amaka was not just the ugliest girl in the class but the ugliest girl in the whole of JSS 3. She was ugly as FUCK and she never put up an argument with anyone over it because she knew it herself. With a very black and pimples-dominated face, she had big ears, black thin lips and a pair of long spot-full legs PLUS she was far; VERY FAR from sexy. Such an ugly hoe I tell ya! Such an ugly piece of trash…..*straight face*
So you can therefore imagine the shock all the boys went through when, on the first day of school, we discovered Amaka had undergone some huge transformation and had fast blossomed into a woman. She was seriously packing on her chest mayne! Puberty succeeded in blessing that bitch first and it gave her a pair of HUGE, POINTY KNOCKERS. Oh yeah! I’m talking about BIG BOOBIES now!
The disheartening part however was that no other girl, NOT A SINGLE OTHER FEMALE CLASSMATE was equally visited by the spirit of puberty and all of us boys couldn’t fathom why. I mean, why would the spirit choose to upgrade only one girl out of 25???; and the ugliest of them all for that matter???? Mayne, that shit was a real puzzle to me but thinking about it again now, I guess it’s things like this that make life what it is; strange, complex and unfathomable.
In any case, this new development created some form of confusion in class. All the boys disliked Amaka greatly but they couldn’t help but stare hard at her full and swollen blouse each time they passed by her desk. They refused to change their attitude and talk to her while secretly admiring her titties but I understood their plight. That girl was ONE UGLY DAUGHTER OF A HOE MAYNE! I bet the boys also hated the rest of the girls for ‘carrying last’ because they also began to snub them. I mean, no one truly has the right to question God or mother nature but we were only young and stupidly naïve at the time, so who could blame us?
What made matters worse ehn?? Hmmn….Amaka started seeing her period o! You go fear fear naa! A class would just be in session and a boy or two would simply scream-out upon noticing trickles of blood coming from underneath Amaka’s chair and forming a pool on the floor. Such a panic usually made her feel ashamed, embarrassed and more withdrawn and her fellow girls didn’t help matters for they always sneered at her whenever such happened. I know why though….THEY WERE FUCKING JEALOUS that Amaka’s bumbum was leaking blood before theirs…..lolz.
Now, as for me, I was in a little dilemma. I detested Amaka’s face but I admired her new body; especially her rack of course. The sight of those jugs of milk firmly glued to her chest fascinated me and I couldn’t help but fantasise about wrapping one titty with my mouth and milking her like a cow. Funny thing is, each time I shared this fantasy with some of the boys, I always received a slap on the cheek, a knock on the head or a hard pull at my ear while hearing “E be like say you don dey mad abi??? You wan suck ugly geh bobbie? YOU DON CRAZE FINISH!” I always bore the pain and insults though and continued wishing upon Amaka’s breasts; hoping that one day I would get to suck them. That day did actually come and I can never EVER forget it till the day I die…..*perv wink*.
It so happened that one fateful day, my dear Amaka; during an English class, yelled out in pain. Holding her tummy and groaning like a baby, she tumbled out of her chair and unto the hard concrete floor. As she hit the ground with a light thud, confusion set in and the rest of us rose to our feet in hot panic. I and a girl sitting next to Amaka quickly rushed to her side to help her back on her feet and as we gently picked her up, I noticed a small pool of blood had already formed where she lay. I wasted no time in concluding that it was Amaka’s time of the month again and this time, she was having it real bad. I shook my head and pitied her…. “Oh the poor thang!” I thought to myself. I sympathised with the ugly but quite sexy bitch.
By now, Mr. Adetoyinbo, our English teacher had gotten himself into the matter as a super hero to save the situation and help our ugly but boobielicious damsel in distress. “This young lady needs help. Who will volunteer to assist and get her to the school clinic?” he asked but no one responded. The class suddenly became unusually silent and I heard faint grumbles from everyone around me. No one wanted to help an ugly classmate….*shaking my head*
“YOU!....Yes you!” teacher pointed at Ayobami, the tallest boy in the class who was already wearing a frown. “Please come here and kindly assist your classmate to the clinic.”
“Ah! Please sir, I can’t o! My hand is paining me……besides she is just too ugly for me to carry” he mumbled the last part which the teacher didn’t quite hear and that gave me a good chuckle.
“Ehen??? Your hand hurts abi? Which is why you can’t be your brother or in this case; sister’s keeper abi??? You really should be ashamed of yourself.”
And teacher went on showering insults on Ayobami; totally ignoring the fact that Amaka was still writhing in pain. I couldn’t stomach any further delay with all my classmates refusing to volunteer and help so I shocked everyone; well everyone except teacher anyway.
“Excuse me sir, I’ll help” I spat out as I rushed back to Amaka’s side.
“You? But are you sure you can carry her?? You seem too small for this job.”
“Don’t worry sir, I’ll manage” I said convincingly and proceeded to carry Amaka on my back like a little baby. It was when I had her resting firmly on me from behind that I understood teacher’s doubt and fear. Amaka was fucking heavy mayne! I was certain for sure that her big juicy boobs contributed so much to her weight on me and I wondered if I could truly cope and make it to the clinic without me needing some medical attention of my own. I took courage and braced up for the worst still. By the time I was heading out the door, I faintly heard teacher say “God bless you young lad. Such bravery and kindness indeed!”
It was a long, tedious, energy-sapping and sweat-exhausting journey to the clinic. I had to muster every single iota of strength in me to get both Amaka and I to the school clinic. I made it though and once at the entrance, two kind nurses relieved me of my burden and took Amaka from me. I guess she was placed on instant admission for a doctor quickly came out and dismissed me; thanking me and letting me know that she would be fine in no time. As I turned around to make my way out of the building, I felt a wet patch on my shirt sticking to my back and that caused quite an uncomfortable feeling. I pulled out the shirt from my trousers and fought to look at the spot whilst twisting my neck only to find that the wet patch was caused by Amaka’s blood……blood from HER VAGINA??? “CHAI!!!” I thought to myself. “Dis geh don stain me with her menses o!”
You bet that by the time I was back in class, all my classmates were waiting eagerly for me. I expected praises and pats on the back but what I got instead; especially from the boys were hard and heavy knocks on the head. “You this fool! Why did you carry that ugly thing on your back ehn? Couldn’t you have allowed teacher to do it himself when you saw that none of us was willing to help?? Now look, see your shirt now. It’s stained with an ugly girl’s blood. Blood from the ugliest girl in school’s vagina for that matter. I pray you get infected with her ugliness…OLODO!” they all said while jeering at me. I didn’t mind them as usual though. I proceeded to my desk and sat down quietly to review my recent actions. “Did I do the right thing? Was Amaka’s blood going to infect me with something?? Was I going to be the second outcast of the class due to Amaka’s ugliness and my infatuation with her breasts???” I became such a confused soul.
During lunch break, I decided to check up on Amaka and find out how she was doing. As I headed for the clinic, I hoped and prayed she had not leaked-out all the blood in her body through her pussy because that would only mean her boobies would no longer remain big and firm but saggy and squishy and that would be such a terrible development.
Anyway, upon reaching the clinic, one of the nurses who had taken her from me earlier recognised me and kindly led me to her room to see her. I found Amaka on a bed with her eyes closed. I assumed she was asleep and had no intention of waking her. But instead of leaving, I decided to kill some time by staring at her swollen chest. I imagined just what it would be like to actually take those big, twin mounds of milk chambers in my mouth and suck them. I was sure the feeling; unlike her face would be beautiful and my face lit up with a smile.
Amaka coughed just then and opened her eyes. She looked up at me just then and I felt like her eyeballs bore deep holes into my face.
“You’re awake” I quickly began with some uneasiness. “How are you feeling?”
Amaka smiled at me before responding. “I am much better now. Thanks for all your help.” Then she shook me with her next few words…”You may see them if you want to!”
“Huh?? See what?” I asked in beffudlement.
“My breasts of course! I know you want to see them ‘cos you’ve been staring at them since you got here.”
“SHIT!” I said to myself. I was officially busted! “You weren’t really asleep when I walked in right?”
“Nah! I was asleep until I heard my nurse usher you into the room. You’ve been kind to me and I wish to return the kindness. Do you wish to see them or not???”
I felt like this was the only chance I had to see the breasts that I had long fantasised about and be the first boy in JSS 3 to actually see and possibly feel some real puberty boobs. I became fucking animated and my usual perv smile played itself on my face.
“Oh yes, please!” I responded.
Amaka retained her smile as she asked me to go and lock the door. By the time I returned to her side, all the buttons on her blouse had been loosened and her bra unfastened. The white lace breasts-protector hung loosely on her fleshy mountains and my jaw dropped in amazement. Mayne, Amaka’s breasts were big, fair, fresh and firm. They instantly reminded me of N200 Agege bread.
Amaka smiled some more. She knew I was excited about what I was seeing and she encouraged me in my journey to pleasurable ecstasy.
“Go ahead then….Feel ‘em!” she said to me with an alluring voice. I couldn’t believe my luck. Amaka was actually encouraging me to touch and press her bobbie??? CHOI!!! I felt like I was already floating on thin air. I felt on top of the world!
Gently slipping both hands underneath her bra, I made to touch, rub and caress Amaka’s breasts. They felt awesome to touch and I felt my little Mr. P vibrate like Nokia 3310. Amaka’s boobs were soft yet full….big yet delightful. I was really having a ball pressing and squeezing these young and fresh pair of breasts that I really couldn’t help but break into a very popular song by award winning duo, Bracket…………………………..
Na these breasts make people dey say…..I don lose my 6; my brain!
But they can’t stop me from squeezing you…..so I’m with you my lovu-lovu!
With you everything is wellu-wellu….your breasts dey make my heart do yori-yori
Nobody can stop me from sucking your boobs….I’m with you my yori-yori!
You bet that I got Amaka giggling uncontrollably as I sang to myself amid pressing, smooching and squeezing her fascinating breasts. Her giggling face somehow made me realise she wasn’t so ugly when she was in high spirits. I guess all she needed was just to smile and laugh more.
“Debola, you’re not serious o! Is it my boobs you’re calling yori-yori??”
“Ah! Yes nau! Don’t you know you’ve got an amazing rack? You get the other girls jealous all the time with this wonderful pair of milk jugs. I’ve always fantasised about sucking them.”
“Oh really?” she asked me with sincere curiosity.
“Why yes!...Honest!” and then I resumed singing………………………
Your breasts dey affect my brain
And if I suck am, I go go insane
Please leave am the way e dey…the way e dey….ooh my love!
I say your breasts dey affect my brain
If I no take time, I go go insane
Abeg allow me suck am today…suck am today…ooh my love!
I say na dis bobbie dey make people dey say….. I don lose my 6; my brain
But they can’t stop me from….&^%$%$£”&…..
Amaka didn’t let me finish. She placed a finger across my lips to hush me and said “Look, nurse will soon be back, I’m sure. If you really wanna suck on my breasts, now’s your chance!”
I was like “EWOOO! You’re right o!”
What do you figure I did next EHN???...........*perv grin*
Yours truly,
That Bloody Pervert
The teacher had asked us all our ages once and declared that either before the end of the term or at the beginning of the new term, we would all have attained puberty; the girls going first of course. That was his prediction. He also said we boys had to wait for a few more months after the girls had fully gone through that cycle to experience ours.
Now, thinking about it all over again, I really don’t know what our craze about puberty was all about at the time but I guess it was because it had something to do with bigger boobs, bush on the punana, and the accompanying awesome feeling of horniness. I mean, these were signs all the boys wanted to see; especially me who was still a young budding pervert at the time…lolz. I was already used to seeing animated bushfull vaginas on the pages of ‘Nackson’ magazine and I wanted to see what a real feminine bush looked like. (I know what you’re thinking now. Though I was a young pervert, I was still only hooked to Nackson. No Tickles, No Better Lover; No video PORN yet) Thank you!
So anyway, you can imagine our great disappointment when day after day till the last day of the term, we checked-out our female counterparts’ chests every morning in class but found no sign of improvement or development. We literally visited them; stood in front of their desks and stared at their chests while pretending to be talking to them to see if we could sight some sweet new lumps of mammary matter that we could beg to suck in exchange for a pack of cornflakes or a tin of Milo but ended up discovering nothing. It killed us inside and we began to doubt that biology teacher of ours. We thought maybe he predicted wrongly because he really didn’t know his onions. However, we were indeed the ones who eventually turned out to be wrong.
All the boys of JSS 3D went home disappointed from school for the holiday at the end of the term. We were all dejected because none of us could boast of any sweet tale to share with friends at home about sucking on some freshly-made puberty breasts. We felt our holiday would be boring and we really didn’t look forward to any holiday fun. We had hoped for some titty fun and we got none. It was like our dreams and aspirations had suddenly crashed and come to an end.
Things took an amazing turn however at the beginning of the new term……well not for all of us sha; I won’t lie. What happened was that our class finally got to witness the existence of puberty. YAY!!! The only sad thing about the whole thing was that it happened to ONLY one girl first, LONG BEFORE the other girls experienced such bodily change.
Now Amaka was not just the ugliest girl in the class but the ugliest girl in the whole of JSS 3. She was ugly as FUCK and she never put up an argument with anyone over it because she knew it herself. With a very black and pimples-dominated face, she had big ears, black thin lips and a pair of long spot-full legs PLUS she was far; VERY FAR from sexy. Such an ugly hoe I tell ya! Such an ugly piece of trash…..*straight face*
So you can therefore imagine the shock all the boys went through when, on the first day of school, we discovered Amaka had undergone some huge transformation and had fast blossomed into a woman. She was seriously packing on her chest mayne! Puberty succeeded in blessing that bitch first and it gave her a pair of HUGE, POINTY KNOCKERS. Oh yeah! I’m talking about BIG BOOBIES now!
The disheartening part however was that no other girl, NOT A SINGLE OTHER FEMALE CLASSMATE was equally visited by the spirit of puberty and all of us boys couldn’t fathom why. I mean, why would the spirit choose to upgrade only one girl out of 25???; and the ugliest of them all for that matter???? Mayne, that shit was a real puzzle to me but thinking about it again now, I guess it’s things like this that make life what it is; strange, complex and unfathomable.
In any case, this new development created some form of confusion in class. All the boys disliked Amaka greatly but they couldn’t help but stare hard at her full and swollen blouse each time they passed by her desk. They refused to change their attitude and talk to her while secretly admiring her titties but I understood their plight. That girl was ONE UGLY DAUGHTER OF A HOE MAYNE! I bet the boys also hated the rest of the girls for ‘carrying last’ because they also began to snub them. I mean, no one truly has the right to question God or mother nature but we were only young and stupidly naïve at the time, so who could blame us?
What made matters worse ehn?? Hmmn….Amaka started seeing her period o! You go fear fear naa! A class would just be in session and a boy or two would simply scream-out upon noticing trickles of blood coming from underneath Amaka’s chair and forming a pool on the floor. Such a panic usually made her feel ashamed, embarrassed and more withdrawn and her fellow girls didn’t help matters for they always sneered at her whenever such happened. I know why though….THEY WERE FUCKING JEALOUS that Amaka’s bumbum was leaking blood before theirs…..lolz.
Now, as for me, I was in a little dilemma. I detested Amaka’s face but I admired her new body; especially her rack of course. The sight of those jugs of milk firmly glued to her chest fascinated me and I couldn’t help but fantasise about wrapping one titty with my mouth and milking her like a cow. Funny thing is, each time I shared this fantasy with some of the boys, I always received a slap on the cheek, a knock on the head or a hard pull at my ear while hearing “E be like say you don dey mad abi??? You wan suck ugly geh bobbie? YOU DON CRAZE FINISH!” I always bore the pain and insults though and continued wishing upon Amaka’s breasts; hoping that one day I would get to suck them. That day did actually come and I can never EVER forget it till the day I die…..*perv wink*.
It so happened that one fateful day, my dear Amaka; during an English class, yelled out in pain. Holding her tummy and groaning like a baby, she tumbled out of her chair and unto the hard concrete floor. As she hit the ground with a light thud, confusion set in and the rest of us rose to our feet in hot panic. I and a girl sitting next to Amaka quickly rushed to her side to help her back on her feet and as we gently picked her up, I noticed a small pool of blood had already formed where she lay. I wasted no time in concluding that it was Amaka’s time of the month again and this time, she was having it real bad. I shook my head and pitied her…. “Oh the poor thang!” I thought to myself. I sympathised with the ugly but quite sexy bitch.
By now, Mr. Adetoyinbo, our English teacher had gotten himself into the matter as a super hero to save the situation and help our ugly but boobielicious damsel in distress. “This young lady needs help. Who will volunteer to assist and get her to the school clinic?” he asked but no one responded. The class suddenly became unusually silent and I heard faint grumbles from everyone around me. No one wanted to help an ugly classmate….*shaking my head*
“YOU!....Yes you!” teacher pointed at Ayobami, the tallest boy in the class who was already wearing a frown. “Please come here and kindly assist your classmate to the clinic.”
“Ah! Please sir, I can’t o! My hand is paining me……besides she is just too ugly for me to carry” he mumbled the last part which the teacher didn’t quite hear and that gave me a good chuckle.
“Ehen??? Your hand hurts abi? Which is why you can’t be your brother or in this case; sister’s keeper abi??? You really should be ashamed of yourself.”
And teacher went on showering insults on Ayobami; totally ignoring the fact that Amaka was still writhing in pain. I couldn’t stomach any further delay with all my classmates refusing to volunteer and help so I shocked everyone; well everyone except teacher anyway.
“Excuse me sir, I’ll help” I spat out as I rushed back to Amaka’s side.
“You? But are you sure you can carry her?? You seem too small for this job.”
“Don’t worry sir, I’ll manage” I said convincingly and proceeded to carry Amaka on my back like a little baby. It was when I had her resting firmly on me from behind that I understood teacher’s doubt and fear. Amaka was fucking heavy mayne! I was certain for sure that her big juicy boobs contributed so much to her weight on me and I wondered if I could truly cope and make it to the clinic without me needing some medical attention of my own. I took courage and braced up for the worst still. By the time I was heading out the door, I faintly heard teacher say “God bless you young lad. Such bravery and kindness indeed!”
It was a long, tedious, energy-sapping and sweat-exhausting journey to the clinic. I had to muster every single iota of strength in me to get both Amaka and I to the school clinic. I made it though and once at the entrance, two kind nurses relieved me of my burden and took Amaka from me. I guess she was placed on instant admission for a doctor quickly came out and dismissed me; thanking me and letting me know that she would be fine in no time. As I turned around to make my way out of the building, I felt a wet patch on my shirt sticking to my back and that caused quite an uncomfortable feeling. I pulled out the shirt from my trousers and fought to look at the spot whilst twisting my neck only to find that the wet patch was caused by Amaka’s blood……blood from HER VAGINA??? “CHAI!!!” I thought to myself. “Dis geh don stain me with her menses o!”
You bet that by the time I was back in class, all my classmates were waiting eagerly for me. I expected praises and pats on the back but what I got instead; especially from the boys were hard and heavy knocks on the head. “You this fool! Why did you carry that ugly thing on your back ehn? Couldn’t you have allowed teacher to do it himself when you saw that none of us was willing to help?? Now look, see your shirt now. It’s stained with an ugly girl’s blood. Blood from the ugliest girl in school’s vagina for that matter. I pray you get infected with her ugliness…OLODO!” they all said while jeering at me. I didn’t mind them as usual though. I proceeded to my desk and sat down quietly to review my recent actions. “Did I do the right thing? Was Amaka’s blood going to infect me with something?? Was I going to be the second outcast of the class due to Amaka’s ugliness and my infatuation with her breasts???” I became such a confused soul.
During lunch break, I decided to check up on Amaka and find out how she was doing. As I headed for the clinic, I hoped and prayed she had not leaked-out all the blood in her body through her pussy because that would only mean her boobies would no longer remain big and firm but saggy and squishy and that would be such a terrible development.
Anyway, upon reaching the clinic, one of the nurses who had taken her from me earlier recognised me and kindly led me to her room to see her. I found Amaka on a bed with her eyes closed. I assumed she was asleep and had no intention of waking her. But instead of leaving, I decided to kill some time by staring at her swollen chest. I imagined just what it would be like to actually take those big, twin mounds of milk chambers in my mouth and suck them. I was sure the feeling; unlike her face would be beautiful and my face lit up with a smile.
Amaka coughed just then and opened her eyes. She looked up at me just then and I felt like her eyeballs bore deep holes into my face.
“You’re awake” I quickly began with some uneasiness. “How are you feeling?”
Amaka smiled at me before responding. “I am much better now. Thanks for all your help.” Then she shook me with her next few words…”You may see them if you want to!”
“Huh?? See what?” I asked in beffudlement.
“My breasts of course! I know you want to see them ‘cos you’ve been staring at them since you got here.”
“SHIT!” I said to myself. I was officially busted! “You weren’t really asleep when I walked in right?”
“Nah! I was asleep until I heard my nurse usher you into the room. You’ve been kind to me and I wish to return the kindness. Do you wish to see them or not???”
I felt like this was the only chance I had to see the breasts that I had long fantasised about and be the first boy in JSS 3 to actually see and possibly feel some real puberty boobs. I became fucking animated and my usual perv smile played itself on my face.
“Oh yes, please!” I responded.
Amaka retained her smile as she asked me to go and lock the door. By the time I returned to her side, all the buttons on her blouse had been loosened and her bra unfastened. The white lace breasts-protector hung loosely on her fleshy mountains and my jaw dropped in amazement. Mayne, Amaka’s breasts were big, fair, fresh and firm. They instantly reminded me of N200 Agege bread.
Amaka smiled some more. She knew I was excited about what I was seeing and she encouraged me in my journey to pleasurable ecstasy.
“Go ahead then….Feel ‘em!” she said to me with an alluring voice. I couldn’t believe my luck. Amaka was actually encouraging me to touch and press her bobbie??? CHOI!!! I felt like I was already floating on thin air. I felt on top of the world!
Gently slipping both hands underneath her bra, I made to touch, rub and caress Amaka’s breasts. They felt awesome to touch and I felt my little Mr. P vibrate like Nokia 3310. Amaka’s boobs were soft yet full….big yet delightful. I was really having a ball pressing and squeezing these young and fresh pair of breasts that I really couldn’t help but break into a very popular song by award winning duo, Bracket…………………………..
Na these breasts make people dey say…..I don lose my 6; my brain!
But they can’t stop me from squeezing you…..so I’m with you my lovu-lovu!
With you everything is wellu-wellu….your breasts dey make my heart do yori-yori
Nobody can stop me from sucking your boobs….I’m with you my yori-yori!
You bet that I got Amaka giggling uncontrollably as I sang to myself amid pressing, smooching and squeezing her fascinating breasts. Her giggling face somehow made me realise she wasn’t so ugly when she was in high spirits. I guess all she needed was just to smile and laugh more.
“Debola, you’re not serious o! Is it my boobs you’re calling yori-yori??”
“Ah! Yes nau! Don’t you know you’ve got an amazing rack? You get the other girls jealous all the time with this wonderful pair of milk jugs. I’ve always fantasised about sucking them.”
“Oh really?” she asked me with sincere curiosity.
“Why yes!...Honest!” and then I resumed singing………………………
Your breasts dey affect my brain
And if I suck am, I go go insane
Please leave am the way e dey…the way e dey….ooh my love!
I say your breasts dey affect my brain
If I no take time, I go go insane
Abeg allow me suck am today…suck am today…ooh my love!
I say na dis bobbie dey make people dey say….. I don lose my 6; my brain
But they can’t stop me from….&^%$%$£”&…..
Amaka didn’t let me finish. She placed a finger across my lips to hush me and said “Look, nurse will soon be back, I’m sure. If you really wanna suck on my breasts, now’s your chance!”
I was like “EWOOO! You’re right o!”
What do you figure I did next EHN???...........*perv grin*
Yours truly,
That Bloody Pervert
Monday, January 7, 2013
Ghen-Ghen Lust.
Approximately two months back, I got the rare opportunity of ‘famzing’ (being and acting familiar) with a fast rising female Nigerian musician. I had fallen in love with her first hit-single the instant I heard it on Splash FM in Ibadan and sang it all over the place. I sang it in school, in front of the school’s main gate; in the hostel; while shitting in the toilet; while bathing in the bathroom; even in the kitchen while stealing a floor-mate’s piece of meat. I mean EVERY FUCKING WHERE I went, I sang that piece of good music! In fact ehn, I sang that awesome song so much that my hostel-mates almost nicknamed me ‘Mr. Ghen-Ghen’. No be lie!
Now about this ‘famzing’ ehn? Mayne, shit felt so good at the time. It’s really not just because she’s a celebrity, but more because she is a HOT, YOUNG celebrity. I never knew she would actually respond on Twitter when I told her I liked her song. I assumed that, like the others, she would simply put me in my place and relate instead, with her kind. She however surprised me by replying and thanking me for appreciating her music and even laughed over my Raw Tweet Remix of her lyrics, which I sent to her but that was not my climax, trust me. My climax came when she actually requested a link to a quite popular blogpost of mine involving some of Burna Boy’s lyrics which I twisted for my blogging pleasure. Mayne, I was elated. It was a high point for me for real! I felt on top of the world sending my link to such a sexy hottie who doubled as a gifted musician and also a celebrity. MAYNE, NO BE SMALL TIN O!...lolz
BUT ALAS, the famzing ended so soon! I became super sad when she no longer responded to my tweets; especially the one where I sought her permission to remix her hit single for a story here. Maybe, she panicked; maybe she became skeptical of my intentions or maybe, just maybe she decided to finally give me the ‘Celeb treatment’.
In any case, she may have thought that she had pushed me away completely but as fate would have it, she was so damn wrong because the famzing returned in SUCH AN AWESOME WAY AND IN A WAY THAT NEITHER OF US SAW COMING. OH YEAH!!! *wink*
Oh! By the way, her name is Yeni Alade. I’m sure you know her or have at least, heard of her. She’s so pretty and her songs are so melodious and sexy that they can actually help the average individual attain an orgasm without a sex partner or sex toy. When I first saw her in a music-video with one 6-packed guy like that in ‘Sumtin ya body’, doing some sweet, sensual, crazy things to him; I immediately hated that nigga. I felt like he was tapping current from my crush and the ‘tin bin PAIN ME GAAN!’ I was however elated and relieved to find her alone 97% of the time in her own video for her hit-single and mayne, my mouth watered from beginning till end. Have you seen that video at all? Mayne, her body is SMOKING HOT and her sexy dance moves are erotic enough for me; or any #TeamPerv mate. Each time I got to see that video, I kept thinking to myself “Oh lawd! The things I wanna do to you!….the things I would so love to show you!…if only I could just have 5 minutes with you ehn??? What I will so do ehn??? MEHHNNN!!!”
Anyway, like I said before, Ultra-Famzing took place one memorable day like that and trust me; neither of us saw shit coming…..*shrugs*…..Such is life I guess….HAHAHAHA!!!
On the Saturday before Christmas, I visited Shoprite in Ikeja to pick up some bottles of rose wine and a carton of canned Legend Extra Stout, which I wanted to use for the Xmas celebration. The liquor section was just two rows away from the long payment desk where customers stood patiently in a line and waited to be attended to. I CAUGHT HER VIEW just then. I really don’t know what made me look around or how it happened but I saw her. YESSSS! I saw Yeni! I saw Yeni Alade standing on that same queue with her fully stocked pushcart waiting for her turn. IT WAS UNBELIEVABLE I TELL YA!
I gazed in her direction to see if she had some bodyguards or aides with her but saw none. I then fixed my eyes on her from where I was and understood why. She tried so hard to conceal her identity in a nice disguise but she couldn’t fool me. No famous person can deceive a true fan of theirs you know? I still recognised her even with her wearing a blue scarf to hide both her hair and face plus dark shades to shield her eyes from public recognition. What gave her away however was the T-shirt she had on and of course, her sexy physique. You see, I had watched her latest video a million times to know what she looked like in real life and I knew I could recognise that sexy body frame of hers ANYWHERE. I’ll admit though that what made it easier for me was that she had on one of those Tees which she wore in that lovely video of hers; a black tight-fitting top with a gold-colour inscription saying “Effyzzie Baby”.
Mayne, you can’t possibly believe how dumbfounded I was seeing my ‘Ghen-Ghen’ crush live and in person. I gently put down the carton of Legend Stout which I had already picked and ogled my dearest Yeni. It was when I saw her approach the counter to pay for her product selections that I knew I had to act fast. She would be leaving soon and I would have to contend with fighting for her attention on Twitter again for only God knows how long.
“Hey…Bros, make I borrow your coat abeg.” I whispered to one of the row assistants who passed by me and tried to arrange some cans of beer on a shelf.
“Ehn? Sorry?” the young man seemed taken aback.
I quickly took out my wallet, counted N2,000 and offered it to him. “Bros, abeg make I borrow your coat small. I wan quickly use am do something. I nor go tey abeg.” I pleaded.
The dude stared at me with fear and uncertainty written all over his face. He then stared at the money and said “Ah! Bros, I nor go fit give you my coat o! You wan make I lose my job?”
“You no go lose your job naa! I just wan sharply wear am follow one customer talk and I wan pose as staff. She nor go follow me yarn unless she see me for staff cloth, ABEG!” I pleaded again, this time, taking out two more N1000 notes from my wallet to make my offer N4000.
This guy studied me hard and sized me up; looking at me from head to toe and burying a stare in my eyeballs for a few seconds before taking off his coat. I snatched it from him as he also accepted the money and said “Abeg bros, you go do quick abeg o! Make you nor koba me!” and dashed towards the payment section; struggling to put on the green coat as I ran.
Yeni had just finished paying up and had her bags packed for her when I rushed to stand near a door close to the exit point that carried the sign ‘Store Room, Staff Only’. As she approached me to make her exit, I put up a hand to stop her.
“Good morning ma’am. Sorry to trouble you but would you be so kind to come with me for a quick bag check? It’s a regular procedure here and I’m sorry for the inconvenience.”
Mayne, you should have seen the astonishment and shock on my girl’s face. She looked so confused I almost gave myself away by laughing. I managed to maintain a straight face though and didn’t blow my cover.
“Excuse me! Have I done anything wrong?” she asked with genuine concern. Her words were so softly-spoken and calming that it felt like she was singing instead of speaking.
“Not at all ma’am. Like I said, it’s a random but regular procedure which we carry out here. It won’t take much of your time I promise”. I guess my last few words worked like a charm because my dearest sexy Yeni hesitated for a moment, shrugged and said “Oh what the hell then! Okay, let’s go and do this quickly please! Got other stuff to do today okay?”
I nodded in agreement and immediately became excited. Her “Let’s go and do this quickly please” came off so sensual and so seductive that I wondered if she had a clue as to what I wanted with her. Anyway, I told her “This way please!” and led her into the ‘Store Room, Staff Only’ door, while thinking of how to turn her “Quickly” into a “Quickie”….lolz.
Once inside, Yeni was in for a big surprise. After successfully bolting the door from the inside, I stopped for a minute to visually appreciate my music idol whom I would be ravishing in a moment. Yeni had no idea whatsoever and the minute she folded her arms across her chest and opened her small painted mouth to say “So??? Shall we??? I don’t have all day!”, I RUSHED AT HER! Oh yes! I LITERALLY RUSHED AT HER LIKE how a monkey would rush at a banana; only that this time, I was the monkey and she; DA BANANA!
“WHAT IS THIS? JESUS CHRIST! HOW DARE YOU!!! STOP IT!!!” Yeni yelled at me as I struggled with her; forcefully planting wet kisses all over her neck and tried to kiss her red, sweet and soft-looking lips. I ignored her complaint and took control of those lips of hers as I pressed mine against them for a French kiss while my hands kept themselves busy with her titties and her soft round bumbum.
Yeni somehow found a way to land a hot slap across my left cheek and that dazed me for a few seconds. Hand on cheek, I gazed hard at the person whom I had just forcefully kissed, smiled and thought to myself… “Hmmm…..Gurl, ARE YOU BEAUTIFUL OR WHAT???”
“ARE YOU OKAY? IS THIS THE RANDOM ROUTINE CHECK YOU BROUGHT ME HERE FOR???” she quizzed me with fiery eyes and a deep frown. I smiled at her in my usual perverted manner and sang in response………………………
You know I like you
I’ve got no crush like you
Baby tin fe DO….Tin fe fe….Tin fe DO O!
You know I like you
And I want to DO you
You’re a baby tin fe DO…Tin fe fe….Tin fe DO O!
You had me from the moment I met you
Every song from you feels like Paradise
Make I be your actor o!......BEN 10
Sunmo bi make I lick you o!.....EHEN!
Dis lust na action o!......GHEN-GHEN!.....GHEN-GHEN!....GHEN-GHEN!
Girl you know I like you….Tin fe DO…..Tin fe DO
I’ll place no cunt above you…..Tin fe DO…..Tin fe DO
I swear I’m thirsty for you…..Tin fe DO….Tin fe DO
I go lick your cunt TILL THE END OOOoooooo!!!
Once I was done singing, Yeni’s face suddenly transformed from looking angry and irritated to looking seriously surprised and unsure.
“Wait, wait!....Just wait!....I feel like I know you from somewhere. Gosh! *shaking her head*….Are you….are you….???”
“Yeah baby! I’m @Peniscillin on Twitter. HELLOOooooo!” I quipped and rushed at her again; this time, unbuckling her denim pants with aggression and forcing them to her feet.
Yeni was still baffled “Wait!...Wait!…but how did you……….&^%$£%.” she couldn’t finish her sentence because by now, I was already on my knees and had parted both her fresh legs and her yellow underwear to one side with my fingers to position my tongue on her clitoris. “Hmmnnn…..NICE!!!” I said as I took a whiff of her scent and gave her my first lick.
Yeni whimpered as I tongued her and nibbled on her clit. “Gosh!....Oh shit!....Oh shit!...Oh shit!” was all she could actually mutter as I stroked her clit with my tongue and teased her pink flesh with every flick of it. Her cunt tasted like avocado pear and the juice it secreted took me straight to Cloud 9. Yeni was beautiful down there…..So sexy and sooooo beautiful.
My crush didn’t argue nor struggle anymore as I continued flicking my soft piece of muscular cavity against her clitoris and inside her delightful opening. I squeezed more cunt juice out of her each time I buried and stretched my tongue deep inside her pussy and her moans were truly musical. I knew she was enjoying it and I was happy I finally got the opportunity to give my celeb-crush some good cunnilingus.
Apparently, Yeni began enjoying the head so much that she found a way to raise one leg and rest it on my shoulder as she palmed my head against her V-Section. I didn’t mind. Instead, I regarded that as some encouragement and set out to impress my crush further. I took my tongue out of her sweet wet pussy and looked up at her. Oh she was so pretty! She made me giggle by covering her face in shame as she said “Don’t stop yet nau!” and I obliged her. First, I studied her pussy more carefully as if searching for some hidden element. Next, I used two fingers to part open her pussy lips and I dug my mouth in there again; but this time, taking great care to pay more attention to that little piece of flesh underneath her clit with my tongue. I licked softly and teased it with the tip of my tongue and Yeni pressed my face further into her crotch. “Oh Gosh!...Oh Gosh!...OH GOSH!!!!” she exclaimed as I further nibbled lightly on that piece of flesh and wasted my tongue on its surrounding environment. I thoroughly wanted to dry-clean her pussy but the sexy fluid she kept secreting just wouldn’t let me.
It was when I began switching between licking her clit and dipping my tongue into her sexy wetness at a fast pace that Yeni could take no more and involuntary chose to act like a baby. Heaving three times, Yeni squeezed my face against her pussy so much that I feared I would choke and die while she squealed like a child. I can never EVER forget that pleasant squeal of ecstasy though. It still rings in my head every night when I close my eyes to sleep.
So, that was how my crush came o! She came hard while she squealed and she bathed my face with thick, slimy cum. The taste wasn’t bad so I lapped it all up.
When I got up, Yeni stared hard into my eyes and pulled me closer to her. She then landed me another hot slap saying “This is for the rude inconvenience” before kissing me deeply; giving me a Frenchie and saying “This is for the sweet pleasure too.” Next thing you know, Yeni breaks into her own song but twists her lyrics also………………..
Boy you know I like you
I was just doing shakara for you
Baby tin fe fe….Tin fe fe…..TIN FE FE!
I swear I like you
Cos you licked me real good
You’re a darling tin fe fe….Tin fe fe…..TIN FE FE!
You got me from the moment I met you
You had me floating in Paradise
You can be my actor o!......BEN 10
Anytime you fit lick me o!.....EHEN!
Dis love na action o!......GHEN-GHEN!.....GHEN-GHEN!....GHEN-GHEN!
Boy you know I like you….Tin fe fe…..Tin fe fe!
I’ll place no one above you…..Tin fe fe…..Tin fe fe!
I swear I’m thirsty for you…..Tin fe fe….Tin fe fe!
Na me and you TILL THE END OOOoooooo!!!
Yeni and I ended up kissing some more and leaving Shoprite together; HAND IN HAND!......... *in Wizkid’s voice*….IYAHHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII !!!
Yours truly,
That Bloody Pervert
Now about this ‘famzing’ ehn? Mayne, shit felt so good at the time. It’s really not just because she’s a celebrity, but more because she is a HOT, YOUNG celebrity. I never knew she would actually respond on Twitter when I told her I liked her song. I assumed that, like the others, she would simply put me in my place and relate instead, with her kind. She however surprised me by replying and thanking me for appreciating her music and even laughed over my Raw Tweet Remix of her lyrics, which I sent to her but that was not my climax, trust me. My climax came when she actually requested a link to a quite popular blogpost of mine involving some of Burna Boy’s lyrics which I twisted for my blogging pleasure. Mayne, I was elated. It was a high point for me for real! I felt on top of the world sending my link to such a sexy hottie who doubled as a gifted musician and also a celebrity. MAYNE, NO BE SMALL TIN O!...lolz
BUT ALAS, the famzing ended so soon! I became super sad when she no longer responded to my tweets; especially the one where I sought her permission to remix her hit single for a story here. Maybe, she panicked; maybe she became skeptical of my intentions or maybe, just maybe she decided to finally give me the ‘Celeb treatment’.
In any case, she may have thought that she had pushed me away completely but as fate would have it, she was so damn wrong because the famzing returned in SUCH AN AWESOME WAY AND IN A WAY THAT NEITHER OF US SAW COMING. OH YEAH!!! *wink*
Oh! By the way, her name is Yeni Alade. I’m sure you know her or have at least, heard of her. She’s so pretty and her songs are so melodious and sexy that they can actually help the average individual attain an orgasm without a sex partner or sex toy. When I first saw her in a music-video with one 6-packed guy like that in ‘Sumtin ya body’, doing some sweet, sensual, crazy things to him; I immediately hated that nigga. I felt like he was tapping current from my crush and the ‘tin bin PAIN ME GAAN!’ I was however elated and relieved to find her alone 97% of the time in her own video for her hit-single and mayne, my mouth watered from beginning till end. Have you seen that video at all? Mayne, her body is SMOKING HOT and her sexy dance moves are erotic enough for me; or any #TeamPerv mate. Each time I got to see that video, I kept thinking to myself “Oh lawd! The things I wanna do to you!….the things I would so love to show you!…if only I could just have 5 minutes with you ehn??? What I will so do ehn??? MEHHNNN!!!”
Anyway, like I said before, Ultra-Famzing took place one memorable day like that and trust me; neither of us saw shit coming…..*shrugs*…..Such is life I guess….HAHAHAHA!!!
On the Saturday before Christmas, I visited Shoprite in Ikeja to pick up some bottles of rose wine and a carton of canned Legend Extra Stout, which I wanted to use for the Xmas celebration. The liquor section was just two rows away from the long payment desk where customers stood patiently in a line and waited to be attended to. I CAUGHT HER VIEW just then. I really don’t know what made me look around or how it happened but I saw her. YESSSS! I saw Yeni! I saw Yeni Alade standing on that same queue with her fully stocked pushcart waiting for her turn. IT WAS UNBELIEVABLE I TELL YA!
I gazed in her direction to see if she had some bodyguards or aides with her but saw none. I then fixed my eyes on her from where I was and understood why. She tried so hard to conceal her identity in a nice disguise but she couldn’t fool me. No famous person can deceive a true fan of theirs you know? I still recognised her even with her wearing a blue scarf to hide both her hair and face plus dark shades to shield her eyes from public recognition. What gave her away however was the T-shirt she had on and of course, her sexy physique. You see, I had watched her latest video a million times to know what she looked like in real life and I knew I could recognise that sexy body frame of hers ANYWHERE. I’ll admit though that what made it easier for me was that she had on one of those Tees which she wore in that lovely video of hers; a black tight-fitting top with a gold-colour inscription saying “Effyzzie Baby”.
Mayne, you can’t possibly believe how dumbfounded I was seeing my ‘Ghen-Ghen’ crush live and in person. I gently put down the carton of Legend Stout which I had already picked and ogled my dearest Yeni. It was when I saw her approach the counter to pay for her product selections that I knew I had to act fast. She would be leaving soon and I would have to contend with fighting for her attention on Twitter again for only God knows how long.
“Hey…Bros, make I borrow your coat abeg.” I whispered to one of the row assistants who passed by me and tried to arrange some cans of beer on a shelf.
“Ehn? Sorry?” the young man seemed taken aback.
I quickly took out my wallet, counted N2,000 and offered it to him. “Bros, abeg make I borrow your coat small. I wan quickly use am do something. I nor go tey abeg.” I pleaded.
The dude stared at me with fear and uncertainty written all over his face. He then stared at the money and said “Ah! Bros, I nor go fit give you my coat o! You wan make I lose my job?”
“You no go lose your job naa! I just wan sharply wear am follow one customer talk and I wan pose as staff. She nor go follow me yarn unless she see me for staff cloth, ABEG!” I pleaded again, this time, taking out two more N1000 notes from my wallet to make my offer N4000.
This guy studied me hard and sized me up; looking at me from head to toe and burying a stare in my eyeballs for a few seconds before taking off his coat. I snatched it from him as he also accepted the money and said “Abeg bros, you go do quick abeg o! Make you nor koba me!” and dashed towards the payment section; struggling to put on the green coat as I ran.
Yeni had just finished paying up and had her bags packed for her when I rushed to stand near a door close to the exit point that carried the sign ‘Store Room, Staff Only’. As she approached me to make her exit, I put up a hand to stop her.
“Good morning ma’am. Sorry to trouble you but would you be so kind to come with me for a quick bag check? It’s a regular procedure here and I’m sorry for the inconvenience.”
Mayne, you should have seen the astonishment and shock on my girl’s face. She looked so confused I almost gave myself away by laughing. I managed to maintain a straight face though and didn’t blow my cover.
“Excuse me! Have I done anything wrong?” she asked with genuine concern. Her words were so softly-spoken and calming that it felt like she was singing instead of speaking.
“Not at all ma’am. Like I said, it’s a random but regular procedure which we carry out here. It won’t take much of your time I promise”. I guess my last few words worked like a charm because my dearest sexy Yeni hesitated for a moment, shrugged and said “Oh what the hell then! Okay, let’s go and do this quickly please! Got other stuff to do today okay?”
I nodded in agreement and immediately became excited. Her “Let’s go and do this quickly please” came off so sensual and so seductive that I wondered if she had a clue as to what I wanted with her. Anyway, I told her “This way please!” and led her into the ‘Store Room, Staff Only’ door, while thinking of how to turn her “Quickly” into a “Quickie”….lolz.
Once inside, Yeni was in for a big surprise. After successfully bolting the door from the inside, I stopped for a minute to visually appreciate my music idol whom I would be ravishing in a moment. Yeni had no idea whatsoever and the minute she folded her arms across her chest and opened her small painted mouth to say “So??? Shall we??? I don’t have all day!”, I RUSHED AT HER! Oh yes! I LITERALLY RUSHED AT HER LIKE how a monkey would rush at a banana; only that this time, I was the monkey and she; DA BANANA!
“WHAT IS THIS? JESUS CHRIST! HOW DARE YOU!!! STOP IT!!!” Yeni yelled at me as I struggled with her; forcefully planting wet kisses all over her neck and tried to kiss her red, sweet and soft-looking lips. I ignored her complaint and took control of those lips of hers as I pressed mine against them for a French kiss while my hands kept themselves busy with her titties and her soft round bumbum.
Yeni somehow found a way to land a hot slap across my left cheek and that dazed me for a few seconds. Hand on cheek, I gazed hard at the person whom I had just forcefully kissed, smiled and thought to myself… “Hmmm…..Gurl, ARE YOU BEAUTIFUL OR WHAT???”
“ARE YOU OKAY? IS THIS THE RANDOM ROUTINE CHECK YOU BROUGHT ME HERE FOR???” she quizzed me with fiery eyes and a deep frown. I smiled at her in my usual perverted manner and sang in response………………………
You know I like you
I’ve got no crush like you
Baby tin fe DO….Tin fe fe….Tin fe DO O!
You know I like you
And I want to DO you
You’re a baby tin fe DO…Tin fe fe….Tin fe DO O!
You had me from the moment I met you
Every song from you feels like Paradise
Make I be your actor o!......BEN 10
Sunmo bi make I lick you o!.....EHEN!
Dis lust na action o!......GHEN-GHEN!.....GHEN-GHEN!....GHEN-GHEN!
Girl you know I like you….Tin fe DO…..Tin fe DO
I’ll place no cunt above you…..Tin fe DO…..Tin fe DO
I swear I’m thirsty for you…..Tin fe DO….Tin fe DO
I go lick your cunt TILL THE END OOOoooooo!!!
Once I was done singing, Yeni’s face suddenly transformed from looking angry and irritated to looking seriously surprised and unsure.
“Wait, wait!....Just wait!....I feel like I know you from somewhere. Gosh! *shaking her head*….Are you….are you….???”
“Yeah baby! I’m @Peniscillin on Twitter. HELLOOooooo!” I quipped and rushed at her again; this time, unbuckling her denim pants with aggression and forcing them to her feet.
Yeni was still baffled “Wait!...Wait!…but how did you……….&^%$£%.” she couldn’t finish her sentence because by now, I was already on my knees and had parted both her fresh legs and her yellow underwear to one side with my fingers to position my tongue on her clitoris. “Hmmnnn…..NICE!!!” I said as I took a whiff of her scent and gave her my first lick.
Yeni whimpered as I tongued her and nibbled on her clit. “Gosh!....Oh shit!....Oh shit!...Oh shit!” was all she could actually mutter as I stroked her clit with my tongue and teased her pink flesh with every flick of it. Her cunt tasted like avocado pear and the juice it secreted took me straight to Cloud 9. Yeni was beautiful down there…..So sexy and sooooo beautiful.
My crush didn’t argue nor struggle anymore as I continued flicking my soft piece of muscular cavity against her clitoris and inside her delightful opening. I squeezed more cunt juice out of her each time I buried and stretched my tongue deep inside her pussy and her moans were truly musical. I knew she was enjoying it and I was happy I finally got the opportunity to give my celeb-crush some good cunnilingus.
Apparently, Yeni began enjoying the head so much that she found a way to raise one leg and rest it on my shoulder as she palmed my head against her V-Section. I didn’t mind. Instead, I regarded that as some encouragement and set out to impress my crush further. I took my tongue out of her sweet wet pussy and looked up at her. Oh she was so pretty! She made me giggle by covering her face in shame as she said “Don’t stop yet nau!” and I obliged her. First, I studied her pussy more carefully as if searching for some hidden element. Next, I used two fingers to part open her pussy lips and I dug my mouth in there again; but this time, taking great care to pay more attention to that little piece of flesh underneath her clit with my tongue. I licked softly and teased it with the tip of my tongue and Yeni pressed my face further into her crotch. “Oh Gosh!...Oh Gosh!...OH GOSH!!!!” she exclaimed as I further nibbled lightly on that piece of flesh and wasted my tongue on its surrounding environment. I thoroughly wanted to dry-clean her pussy but the sexy fluid she kept secreting just wouldn’t let me.
It was when I began switching between licking her clit and dipping my tongue into her sexy wetness at a fast pace that Yeni could take no more and involuntary chose to act like a baby. Heaving three times, Yeni squeezed my face against her pussy so much that I feared I would choke and die while she squealed like a child. I can never EVER forget that pleasant squeal of ecstasy though. It still rings in my head every night when I close my eyes to sleep.
So, that was how my crush came o! She came hard while she squealed and she bathed my face with thick, slimy cum. The taste wasn’t bad so I lapped it all up.
When I got up, Yeni stared hard into my eyes and pulled me closer to her. She then landed me another hot slap saying “This is for the rude inconvenience” before kissing me deeply; giving me a Frenchie and saying “This is for the sweet pleasure too.” Next thing you know, Yeni breaks into her own song but twists her lyrics also………………..
Boy you know I like you
I was just doing shakara for you
Baby tin fe fe….Tin fe fe…..TIN FE FE!
I swear I like you
Cos you licked me real good
You’re a darling tin fe fe….Tin fe fe…..TIN FE FE!
You got me from the moment I met you
You had me floating in Paradise
You can be my actor o!......BEN 10
Anytime you fit lick me o!.....EHEN!
Dis love na action o!......GHEN-GHEN!.....GHEN-GHEN!....GHEN-GHEN!
Boy you know I like you….Tin fe fe…..Tin fe fe!
I’ll place no one above you…..Tin fe fe…..Tin fe fe!
I swear I’m thirsty for you…..Tin fe fe….Tin fe fe!
Na me and you TILL THE END OOOoooooo!!!
Yeni and I ended up kissing some more and leaving Shoprite together; HAND IN HAND!......... *in Wizkid’s voice*….IYAHHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII !!!
Yours truly,
That Bloody Pervert
Friday, January 4, 2013
The Maid Who Ate Prickdomie Noodles
(Soliloquising) OOOooooohh!!! *rubs tummy while groaning*……Na wa o! Hunger AGAIN??? Chai!!! *rubs tummy some more*. Who even encouraged me to take that multivitamin sef? Na which kain yawa be dis naa?....ehn??...After I bin don chop just one hour earlier???...*shakes head*….I yaff enterrit o!
Hey you? How you dey naa? Have I told you Happy New Year yet? If not Happy New Year o! You’re greeting me back abi? Ehn, thank you jare but that is not my problem right now. *rubs tummy again*…..Na wa o! And na only me dey dis house now. I don’t know how to cook and I’m already hungry again. YOU SEE MY LIFE??? *shakes head*.
My younger brother who helped make concoction macaroni for me an hour ago has left me for his girlfriend’s place and I don’t know what to do now. Chai! Why didn’t I listen to mummy when she always advised that I stay with her in the kitchen while she cooked? Common white rice or yam, I cannot boil now…..*shakes head*
And the most painful part is that we no longer have a housemaid whom I could have ordered to prepare a meal for me. Mummy sacked her last week and sent her packing to Calabar where she came from. Why??? You’re asking me abi??? Hehehe……I WEE TELL YOU!!!
You see, once upon a time we had a housegirl whom mummy brought from Calabar in Cross River State. She had just clocked 18 when she joined our family through her aunt whom mummy had benignly treated for typhoid fever. I guess mummy had expressed her need for a househelp who could help cook and make the house tidy since all her four ‘soldiers’ were lazy boys. I also guess her patient took pity on her and decided to assist by traveling to her home-state and fetching one of her young nieces for her nurse’s use. What this aunty didn’t know however was that amongst mummy’s soldiers was an able-bodied perverted lieutenant named TBP…..lolz.
Now, this housegirl whom we called Ekaette was indeed a fine young girl. She was facially pretty and well endowed on the chest. Though I didn’t quite appreciate the fact that she was short and had a flat bumbum, I won’t lie sha……she was very hardworking.
Now, I bet you’re wondering if I’m sick or unwell for describing Ekaette in such a sexual manner. Well, you kuku already know me naa! Me wey be say I no dey ever take eye see skirt. You know naa! I’M A BLOODY PERV YO!.....Lolz.
Being totally all boys in the house (except for mummy of course), it was such a pleasure having Ekaette around to add some feminine spice to our home. That bitch sure cooked and cleaned good and was also obedient as fuck. She was such a bush girl; couldn’t speak proper English and hardly knew anything, so she did just as she was told and never bothered to raise an eyebrow at any command or request. *shakes head*…..such a naive bitch I tell ya!.....*shakes head*.
None of my brothers ever paid particular attention to Ekaette. I was the only one who stared at her chest while she dusted and I was the only one who ogled her bosom whilst she served our food. But hey!....don’t get it twisted o! I am damn sure I am not the only pervert in my family. I guess it’s just that while my brothers probably saw Ekaette as a young and naïve girl, I chose to regard her as potential lay….afterall, girl wey clock 18 no be small pikin again naa!....SEBI????.....lolz
*remembers something and chuckles*…………..Now you see Ekaette ehn? She was such a bush geh! A very bush geh! Infact ehn, na OVERBUSH dey worry am sef…..lolz. Everything around the house seemed like magic to her and she never could hide her amazement over certain things. The gas cooker, electric stove, generating set, vacuum-cleaner, microwave oven and lots more always made her feel like she was seeing and touching heavenly items, but the best part….the best part….wait for it…..the best part was the TELEVISION SET!!!
Hahahahaha!!!........Ekaette was such an ignoramus over the TV in the living room. She never failed to stare at it and leave her mouth agape in excitement whenever it was turned on. Images of people; the things they did and places shown must have seemed like magic to her. I know this because unlike my brothers, I always studied her. Well actually, more like stare at her big jugs first before observing her all round…..lolz.
It was quite unfortunate though that Ekaette never really got to watch much of TV while with us. It wasn’t ika (intentional wickedness) or anything o! It was simply that while mum and dad were away at work during the day, the TV remained off because I was always on my mini laptop in my room and my brothers were more often than not in school. The only few times she actually got to see it work was during the evenings when both mum and dad were back home and their ‘four soldiers’ were with them in the living room. Though Ekaette actually spent more time in the kitchen during this period, she did steal some brief moments while serving us dinner and taking further instructions from both dad and mum to stand and stare at our big plasma screen with wide eyes and marvel at the sound and images that came from it. I bet those moments had her AWESTRUCK……lolz.
Now one fateful day and some months into her stay with us, I was alone in the house with Ekaette. I was actually in the living-room this time around and was typing away on my lappy’s keyboard while working on a new blogpost when my tummy rumbled. I ignored the sharp discomfort and continued hitting keys again with my fingers when the second rumble came. This time, the rumble came hard and with some pain and I immediately realised my stomach was sending me a message – IT NEEDED FOOD.
Because I am lazy as fuck and highly incapable of preparing my own meals, I resorted to doing the obvious………………………….
“Ekaette!......EKAETTE!!!”
“SIR!......I DEY COME! And she came running out, having nothing on but A TOWEL!
I must confess that I got really excited and aroused seeing her like that. She looked so sexy in that local but appealing body frame of hers and she looked like the average bathroom model. I glanced at her exposed neck and shoulders first before my eyes moved on over to her equally exposed arms and legs. It was when those perverted eyes got to her bulbous, protuberant and bulging bosom that they halted and did full stop. Her breasts weren’t fully covered and their top flesh looked full and ripe. My mouth watered just then and Mr. P stirred, saying “Hello”. Those filthy eyes of mine remain fixated there while I fought hard to regain consciousness and continue speaking.
“Sir, I don come…*doing the curtsy*…wetin sir?” she asked innocently.
“Er….sorry o! I nor know say na only towel you tie.” I tried to sound as apologetic as possible.
“Ah! Sir, no problem o!”…*curtsying again*…I just wash your brother cloth finish so I say make I baff. You need anything?”
“Em….yes dear. I dey hungry. I go like chop.” I replied, my eyes never leaving her chest.
“Okay sir. Na wetin you want make I put for fire?” she asked curtsying again….*shakes head*.
“Er…well….uhn! Now na dat one be the problem o! I nor even know wetin I go like chop sef.”
“Ehen? Ehn sir, shey make I do beans?” she asked smiling.
“Er….NO!”
“Make I make eba for you?”
“Eba ke? NAH!”
“Semo?”
“Ahn-ahn! NO!”
“Ah!” she seemed a bit nervous now and I felt she was desperate to please me. “Em…em…shey you want make I cook dat tin wey dem show for TV for night?”
“Huh? Na which one be dat one?” I asked with genuine curiosity.
Ekaette got excited at that question and instantly became animated. “Sir, na that one for TV nau wey dem day sing “Bamba lala!….Bamba LALA!”
I laughed hard for it hit me that she was singing the catchy and popular Honeywell Noodles TV/Radio jingle. I was amused now and decided to exploit her for more amusement. “Oh! You mean, Tasty and Delicious….Nourishing and exciting….???” I sang, waiting for her humourous response.
“BAMBA LALA!.....BAMBA LALA!!!” she jumped and shouted gleefully but that was when things took a different turn. As she landed, her towel loosened and her breasts suddenly became fully exposed to my viewing pleasure. Ashamed, she quickly held on to the piece of cotton and struggled to wrap up herself properly but I stopped her.
“Wait…Wait dear!....Lemme see! I got up quickly and pulled off the towel before cupping her big fresh titties. They felt like sponge-cake and they felt nice to the touch. Ekaette became astonished and shy and tried to pull away but I didn’t let her. “Broda, broda…AH!” she exclaimed.
“Wait nau! Relax, make I feel dem small naa!” I said to her as I began caressing and squeezing her sexy bobbielicious boobies.
“Ah!...Broda! Broda, AH!” she kept saying as I had my way with her chest.
“Ekaette wait nau! You nor know say I don already sabi wetin I go like chop now?” I informed her while I had by now, deployed my hungry mouth to the boobs and sucked on them like there was no tomorrow. The sucking was terribly delightful I tell ya!....lolz
“Ah! Broda, oya tell me nau, make I enter kitchen for you.”
“No need to enter kitchen you hear? Na the honey for your Honeywell me go like chop” I said with a mischievous grin.
“Ah! Broda, I nor get any honey for my bodi o!” she lamented while my buccal cavity still did justice to her sweet bosom.
I took my mouth off her titties for a moment to enable me reply her with an appropriate song………………………..
You’ve got a Honeywell……come taste my hard noodle
BAMBA LALA……BAMBA LALA!
It’s tasty and delicious…..nourishing and exciting
BAMBA LALA…….BAMBA LALA!
Release your well to me…..come and enjoy it
Would you be surprised if I told you that Ekaette responded now with her own “BAMBA LALA!....BAMBA LALA!”??? Well, she did o…..so naively and that was how I got to fuck her.
We began our act of fuckery with me still sucking on her big, firm luscious boobs before reaching for the V on her crotch and finding her clitoris to stroke it. At this, Ekaette lost all inhibition and eased up on me as she moaned in a local voice – “Yiiiisshhhhh….Ooooosshhhh….Aaaarrrssshhhhhh”. Ordinarily, I would have been put off by this but I guess her boobies were the encouraging factor/variable.
Next, I fingered her pussy, which had already become very wet and I did it fast and furiously till that pussy started leaking off some fluid unto the floor. Now I bet you’re thinking, “Shey at 18 she nor be virgin ni???” Well, me sef tire for the matter o! But I guess, unto Calabar levels naa, person go don sample am for her village….lolz. Anyways, I think my super-fingering sort of made her legs suddenly go weak sha because she held on to me like she couldn’t stand on her own two feet no more so I gently placed her down on the couch.
In a flash, I was completely naked just like Ekaette and I proceeded to do some more justice to her pussy and fuck her silly. I stuck an already stiff Mr. P into it and humped away on her like a bunny. Mayne, I won’t lie, that pussy was tight and sweet as fuck and for a very brief moment, I was tempted to believe local or bush pussy remained the sweetest in the continent of Africa….*smh at myself*.
Anyway, I continued pounding and beating up Ekaette’s pussy until we both came. Somehow, I feel like I even gave that bitch her first orgasm sef….lolz. I helped her condition shey???
After our raw couchy-sex, I dismissed Ekaette and ordered her to prepare some noodles for me. This, she did with glee because she put some extra pepper and crayfish just the way I like it and she even added a big piece of turkey from the pot to my enjoyment. HAHA!!!
Trouble however sprung up later that night when mummy got home. I mean, I had always known that Ekaette was naïve but I didn’t expect her to be that naïve and close to stupidity. She immediately gave me away when the family was complete in the living room and mummy summoned her to ask what she had eaten for lunch. In her response, Ekaette sang like…..em…I wouldn’t say a little bird but a little bitch.
Mummy, broda e too good o!.....E TOO GOOD!
Broda e too much o!.....E TOO MUCH!
E give me PRICKDOMIE……E TOO GOOD!
E give me PRICKDOMIE……E TOO MUCH!
Im PRICKDOMIE sweet well-well!......E TOO GOOD!
Im PRICKDOMIE good well-well!.......E TOO GOOD!
I’m sure you already know how my mum responded to Ekaette’s feedback.
Yours truly,
That Bloody Pervert
Hey you? How you dey naa? Have I told you Happy New Year yet? If not Happy New Year o! You’re greeting me back abi? Ehn, thank you jare but that is not my problem right now. *rubs tummy again*…..Na wa o! And na only me dey dis house now. I don’t know how to cook and I’m already hungry again. YOU SEE MY LIFE??? *shakes head*.
My younger brother who helped make concoction macaroni for me an hour ago has left me for his girlfriend’s place and I don’t know what to do now. Chai! Why didn’t I listen to mummy when she always advised that I stay with her in the kitchen while she cooked? Common white rice or yam, I cannot boil now…..*shakes head*
And the most painful part is that we no longer have a housemaid whom I could have ordered to prepare a meal for me. Mummy sacked her last week and sent her packing to Calabar where she came from. Why??? You’re asking me abi??? Hehehe……I WEE TELL YOU!!!
You see, once upon a time we had a housegirl whom mummy brought from Calabar in Cross River State. She had just clocked 18 when she joined our family through her aunt whom mummy had benignly treated for typhoid fever. I guess mummy had expressed her need for a househelp who could help cook and make the house tidy since all her four ‘soldiers’ were lazy boys. I also guess her patient took pity on her and decided to assist by traveling to her home-state and fetching one of her young nieces for her nurse’s use. What this aunty didn’t know however was that amongst mummy’s soldiers was an able-bodied perverted lieutenant named TBP…..lolz.
Now, this housegirl whom we called Ekaette was indeed a fine young girl. She was facially pretty and well endowed on the chest. Though I didn’t quite appreciate the fact that she was short and had a flat bumbum, I won’t lie sha……she was very hardworking.
Now, I bet you’re wondering if I’m sick or unwell for describing Ekaette in such a sexual manner. Well, you kuku already know me naa! Me wey be say I no dey ever take eye see skirt. You know naa! I’M A BLOODY PERV YO!.....Lolz.
Being totally all boys in the house (except for mummy of course), it was such a pleasure having Ekaette around to add some feminine spice to our home. That bitch sure cooked and cleaned good and was also obedient as fuck. She was such a bush girl; couldn’t speak proper English and hardly knew anything, so she did just as she was told and never bothered to raise an eyebrow at any command or request. *shakes head*…..such a naive bitch I tell ya!.....*shakes head*.
None of my brothers ever paid particular attention to Ekaette. I was the only one who stared at her chest while she dusted and I was the only one who ogled her bosom whilst she served our food. But hey!....don’t get it twisted o! I am damn sure I am not the only pervert in my family. I guess it’s just that while my brothers probably saw Ekaette as a young and naïve girl, I chose to regard her as potential lay….afterall, girl wey clock 18 no be small pikin again naa!....SEBI????.....lolz
*remembers something and chuckles*…………..Now you see Ekaette ehn? She was such a bush geh! A very bush geh! Infact ehn, na OVERBUSH dey worry am sef…..lolz. Everything around the house seemed like magic to her and she never could hide her amazement over certain things. The gas cooker, electric stove, generating set, vacuum-cleaner, microwave oven and lots more always made her feel like she was seeing and touching heavenly items, but the best part….the best part….wait for it…..the best part was the TELEVISION SET!!!
Hahahahaha!!!........Ekaette was such an ignoramus over the TV in the living room. She never failed to stare at it and leave her mouth agape in excitement whenever it was turned on. Images of people; the things they did and places shown must have seemed like magic to her. I know this because unlike my brothers, I always studied her. Well actually, more like stare at her big jugs first before observing her all round…..lolz.
It was quite unfortunate though that Ekaette never really got to watch much of TV while with us. It wasn’t ika (intentional wickedness) or anything o! It was simply that while mum and dad were away at work during the day, the TV remained off because I was always on my mini laptop in my room and my brothers were more often than not in school. The only few times she actually got to see it work was during the evenings when both mum and dad were back home and their ‘four soldiers’ were with them in the living room. Though Ekaette actually spent more time in the kitchen during this period, she did steal some brief moments while serving us dinner and taking further instructions from both dad and mum to stand and stare at our big plasma screen with wide eyes and marvel at the sound and images that came from it. I bet those moments had her AWESTRUCK……lolz.
Now one fateful day and some months into her stay with us, I was alone in the house with Ekaette. I was actually in the living-room this time around and was typing away on my lappy’s keyboard while working on a new blogpost when my tummy rumbled. I ignored the sharp discomfort and continued hitting keys again with my fingers when the second rumble came. This time, the rumble came hard and with some pain and I immediately realised my stomach was sending me a message – IT NEEDED FOOD.
Because I am lazy as fuck and highly incapable of preparing my own meals, I resorted to doing the obvious………………………….
“Ekaette!......EKAETTE!!!”
“SIR!......I DEY COME! And she came running out, having nothing on but A TOWEL!
I must confess that I got really excited and aroused seeing her like that. She looked so sexy in that local but appealing body frame of hers and she looked like the average bathroom model. I glanced at her exposed neck and shoulders first before my eyes moved on over to her equally exposed arms and legs. It was when those perverted eyes got to her bulbous, protuberant and bulging bosom that they halted and did full stop. Her breasts weren’t fully covered and their top flesh looked full and ripe. My mouth watered just then and Mr. P stirred, saying “Hello”. Those filthy eyes of mine remain fixated there while I fought hard to regain consciousness and continue speaking.
“Sir, I don come…*doing the curtsy*…wetin sir?” she asked innocently.
“Er….sorry o! I nor know say na only towel you tie.” I tried to sound as apologetic as possible.
“Ah! Sir, no problem o!”…*curtsying again*…I just wash your brother cloth finish so I say make I baff. You need anything?”
“Em….yes dear. I dey hungry. I go like chop.” I replied, my eyes never leaving her chest.
“Okay sir. Na wetin you want make I put for fire?” she asked curtsying again….*shakes head*.
“Er…well….uhn! Now na dat one be the problem o! I nor even know wetin I go like chop sef.”
“Ehen? Ehn sir, shey make I do beans?” she asked smiling.
“Er….NO!”
“Make I make eba for you?”
“Eba ke? NAH!”
“Semo?”
“Ahn-ahn! NO!”
“Ah!” she seemed a bit nervous now and I felt she was desperate to please me. “Em…em…shey you want make I cook dat tin wey dem show for TV for night?”
“Huh? Na which one be dat one?” I asked with genuine curiosity.
Ekaette got excited at that question and instantly became animated. “Sir, na that one for TV nau wey dem day sing “Bamba lala!….Bamba LALA!”
I laughed hard for it hit me that she was singing the catchy and popular Honeywell Noodles TV/Radio jingle. I was amused now and decided to exploit her for more amusement. “Oh! You mean, Tasty and Delicious….Nourishing and exciting….???” I sang, waiting for her humourous response.
“BAMBA LALA!.....BAMBA LALA!!!” she jumped and shouted gleefully but that was when things took a different turn. As she landed, her towel loosened and her breasts suddenly became fully exposed to my viewing pleasure. Ashamed, she quickly held on to the piece of cotton and struggled to wrap up herself properly but I stopped her.
“Wait…Wait dear!....Lemme see! I got up quickly and pulled off the towel before cupping her big fresh titties. They felt like sponge-cake and they felt nice to the touch. Ekaette became astonished and shy and tried to pull away but I didn’t let her. “Broda, broda…AH!” she exclaimed.
“Wait nau! Relax, make I feel dem small naa!” I said to her as I began caressing and squeezing her sexy bobbielicious boobies.
“Ah!...Broda! Broda, AH!” she kept saying as I had my way with her chest.
“Ekaette wait nau! You nor know say I don already sabi wetin I go like chop now?” I informed her while I had by now, deployed my hungry mouth to the boobs and sucked on them like there was no tomorrow. The sucking was terribly delightful I tell ya!....lolz
“Ah! Broda, oya tell me nau, make I enter kitchen for you.”
“No need to enter kitchen you hear? Na the honey for your Honeywell me go like chop” I said with a mischievous grin.
“Ah! Broda, I nor get any honey for my bodi o!” she lamented while my buccal cavity still did justice to her sweet bosom.
I took my mouth off her titties for a moment to enable me reply her with an appropriate song………………………..
You’ve got a Honeywell……come taste my hard noodle
BAMBA LALA……BAMBA LALA!
It’s tasty and delicious…..nourishing and exciting
BAMBA LALA…….BAMBA LALA!
Release your well to me…..come and enjoy it
Would you be surprised if I told you that Ekaette responded now with her own “BAMBA LALA!....BAMBA LALA!”??? Well, she did o…..so naively and that was how I got to fuck her.
We began our act of fuckery with me still sucking on her big, firm luscious boobs before reaching for the V on her crotch and finding her clitoris to stroke it. At this, Ekaette lost all inhibition and eased up on me as she moaned in a local voice – “Yiiiisshhhhh….Ooooosshhhh….Aaaarrrssshhhhhh”. Ordinarily, I would have been put off by this but I guess her boobies were the encouraging factor/variable.
Next, I fingered her pussy, which had already become very wet and I did it fast and furiously till that pussy started leaking off some fluid unto the floor. Now I bet you’re thinking, “Shey at 18 she nor be virgin ni???” Well, me sef tire for the matter o! But I guess, unto Calabar levels naa, person go don sample am for her village….lolz. Anyways, I think my super-fingering sort of made her legs suddenly go weak sha because she held on to me like she couldn’t stand on her own two feet no more so I gently placed her down on the couch.
In a flash, I was completely naked just like Ekaette and I proceeded to do some more justice to her pussy and fuck her silly. I stuck an already stiff Mr. P into it and humped away on her like a bunny. Mayne, I won’t lie, that pussy was tight and sweet as fuck and for a very brief moment, I was tempted to believe local or bush pussy remained the sweetest in the continent of Africa….*smh at myself*.
Anyway, I continued pounding and beating up Ekaette’s pussy until we both came. Somehow, I feel like I even gave that bitch her first orgasm sef….lolz. I helped her condition shey???
After our raw couchy-sex, I dismissed Ekaette and ordered her to prepare some noodles for me. This, she did with glee because she put some extra pepper and crayfish just the way I like it and she even added a big piece of turkey from the pot to my enjoyment. HAHA!!!
Trouble however sprung up later that night when mummy got home. I mean, I had always known that Ekaette was naïve but I didn’t expect her to be that naïve and close to stupidity. She immediately gave me away when the family was complete in the living room and mummy summoned her to ask what she had eaten for lunch. In her response, Ekaette sang like…..em…I wouldn’t say a little bird but a little bitch.
Mummy, broda e too good o!.....E TOO GOOD!
Broda e too much o!.....E TOO MUCH!
E give me PRICKDOMIE……E TOO GOOD!
E give me PRICKDOMIE……E TOO MUCH!
Im PRICKDOMIE sweet well-well!......E TOO GOOD!
Im PRICKDOMIE good well-well!.......E TOO GOOD!
I’m sure you already know how my mum responded to Ekaette’s feedback.
Yours truly,
That Bloody Pervert
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