(A 50% Fiction, 50% Factual Story)
Mayne I won’t lie! It was fun all through for me last Saturday. As iiinnnn!….that day was totally, completely and purely CRAZY. Word yo! A big shout-out and huge thanks go out to the entire crew who made it possible, led by my old buddy from Lagos State University (LASU) – General Yong aka @efeyong. Thanks for a swell time bruv! I sure do earnestly look forward to another…..*wink*….but em….#NoHomo….Hehehe……...
Yeah! The events of last Saturday, without a doubt, jolted my memory on an almost similar incident which took place very early this year with some members of my real crew – The Nobles…………. (No offense Yong). Just like the very recent one, there was more than enough booze; there were hoes and there was almost an orgy…..Lolz. Allow me quickly run you through what went down recently first before I tell the main tale and maybe….just maybe you might appreciate the sick humour I have to share with you in this post…..*smile*.
Now on the Saturday that just went by, I must confess that I unusually started it early with alcohol. You know I rep Legend Extra Stout now right? Yeah! That shit is definitely now in the open and my brand has finally come out of the closet. Anyway, one of my hostel mates was kind enough to offer me two bottles of the awesome black stuff while we battled for supremacy in our Chelsea vs. Barcelona match, courtesy of one nigga’s PlayStation 3. I ended up losing the match though and while I patiently waited for my next chance at pride redemption, I decided to log into Twitter in my very usual manner via auracoolonline.com. I had quite a few messages from #TeamPerv tweeps over my recent success of recording 50 blogposts in such a short time but one message in particular got me smiling like a fool who had just been lovestruck. It came from none other than General Yong himself; an old friend from an institution where Great Lasuites are made, informing me that he was an hour and a half close to my current city – Ibadan and he would be happy to reunite with an old buddy of his during his brief stay. I used the digits he left behind to reach him instantly and plan a hook-up time. That came sooner than I actually expected……..Barely 45 minutes after…..Lolz.
So there and then, I took my already intoxicated self on the road to a quite unfamiliar territory in the ancient city on a mission to reunite with my old pal. That trip proved to be worth the while indeed for mad, sick and stupendous fun awaited me as a surprise. I met my buddy in almost a similar state as mine. He was also quite as tipsy as I was and he had also grown a beard like I finally have….lolz. The only things that made the difference were that he now bore a new sobriquet – General Yong, and he visited in a 2012 Land Rover HSE Sport Utility Vehicle along with his right-hand man – T. Money. Yep! YEP! When you’re big, trust me, you’re definitely big! Nuff said!
So anyway, I reunited with ‘The General’, got introduced to T.Money and the fun began. Both General Yong and his ‘Sidekick’ proved themselves to be real super heroes and lavished me with tasty food and more ‘black’ drinks than I could manage. To be honest, I can’t recall ever taking up to seven bottles at any particular sitting. DAMN! Was I fucking wasted when I was done drinking. I bet that if not for the sheer fact that I shook-off some of the liquor through some serious dancing, I would have blacked-out right there on my seat….lolz. But seriously though, you should have been there to see my eyes…..RED AS FUCK! I shook my head a great deal when Yong was kind enough to send me one of the few pictures he took of me that very evening and even tagged some other great Lasuites in it. I was like WHAT DA FUCK! Na me be dis??? Lolz……..
Yeah! Best believe General Yong and T. Money joined in the dancing too. As a matter of fact, I almost learnt a new dance move that evening from Yong. He called it the ‘Groundnut-Eating Style’ and it was simply a cool variant of the currently reigning ‘Etighi dance’ that we normally put up here to matching music. Anyway, I think I almost got the moves right there and then but ask me to attempt that again now and I would simply make a fool of myself. Why??? Because the dance moves left me with all the sweet ‘highness’ that’s why!!!.....Hehehehe……………………
Mayne, it was good booze, delicious food and sweet music all the way while the General and I caught up on old times from our academic days. When it became quite late in the evening, I decided to bid everyone farewell and call it a night but that was exactly when T. Money became my best friend.
“Mehn! With all this fun we’ve been having, e be like say na only toto remain to fuck now o!” he said with a chuckle.
My eyes brightened quickly at those words and it seemed like some of the alcohol had suddenly evaporated from my system. I just couldn’t agree more. Best believe this perv is always like that. My idea of a complete fun hang-out involves eating, drinking, dancing and fucking some pretty bad-ass hoes along with a pack of hommies. It’s always a sweet deal for me anytime and any fucking day….*grin*.
“Mayne, you just spoke my mind” I chipped in amidst some laughter from Yong and two other mates. T. Money beamed a warm, friendly smile at me before Yong then spoke to me “Boss, howfar? Shey you go roll with us? We go fit drop you for your hostel on our way back o!. No P”. I smiled at him and responded with “It’s all good mayne! I’ll be crashing wherever you guys will be crashing”. Everyone then flaunted their joy upon hearing that and I felt more comfortable in their midst.
“So…where to then?” T.Money asked no one in particular. “All I wanna do right now is make ma dick happy. I need to be in an environment with lots of bad bitches. Everywhere I look, I wanna see a bad bitch….left, right and centre. Y’all feel me?”. I nodded in response because I ‘felt’ him completely. Only one place came to mind just then and I grinned from ear to ear. “I’ve got just the place fellaz! Let’s ride!”
So off we went in the Range SUV in search of hoes and some fuckery. We arrived ‘Bubbles Plus’ at about 11pm and as expected, the place was filled with fun-seekers and oh yeah!.....lots and lots of hoes. When we took our seats, we all decided to order only bottled water since we unanimously agreed that we were tipsy enough. I mean, since we anticipated some fucking, everyone desired to be as conscious as possible to enjoy whatever pussy or pussies that would be coming our way. T. Money surprised us all however when he requested a bottle of Harp for himself. I silently prayed his eyes wouldn’t be too red to fish-out a good nasty hoe for his screwing pleasure and I think my prayer was answered…..lolz.
Since the music that the DJ dished out was really good, General Yong, T. Money and I took to the floor for a while as we scanned our vicinity for hoes that would catch our fancy. T. Money however, sort of forgot about the main reason why we were there for a brief moment as he swung and swayed heavily to subsequent old-school sounds with a crew of strangers dressed in similar traditional outfits, sweating profusely as he did so and completely oblivious to all that were watching him in amusement. I confessed to Yong right after that I was sincerely happy for taking all of them there and giving T. Money especially, a swell time.
Just when we admitted that we had had enough dancing for the night and it was time to face the real business that took us there in the first place, we started hunting for ‘take-away packages’. Some really pretty hoes that could have been our choices for the night tried to discourage us on our mission however. These bitches put up some irritating attitude when we approached them. I really can’t remember the rude things they said to us that night but I’m guessing now that it’s probably because we all reeked badly of alcohol and treated them like what they exactly were……BLOODY COCK-SUCKING HOES!
We had almost given up our search for the beautiful, yet polite and amiable queens of the night when I remembered we could still try our luck outside the pub. Lo and behold, I WAS RIGHT….*grin*. AND NOW!............*drums roll*…….INTRODUCING…..ANGELINA!!!
Just as soon as we got outside, we all saw her. I really don’t know about the others but personally, I was like “Woah! Where did this angel of the night come from?….lolz”. Angelina was leaning against a vehicle smaller than ours when we found her and she flashed us a bright smile when we looked in her direction. Her smile truly mesmerised us for she succeeded in making all our jaws drop. It was only T. Money who quickly got it together and waved at her before she waved back and approached us. As she did, I felt some watery pre-cum leave my dick and soil my boxers.
Angelina was truly stunning that night I tell ya! It might have been the alcohol but in my opinion, from head to toe, she truly looked like a sea-goddess with her fresh fair skin and blonde Peruvian hair (fake of course). She truly almost passed for those white hoes from both the UK and the US whom you find on the regular in selected areas at Victoria Island, Lagos from 8pm, except for the fact that her voice quickly gave her away. She had a local eastern accent and I suspected her to be Igbo (no offense to my Igbo readers though). Nonetheless, Angelina truly was definitely on point and a sight to behold. Her Peruvian hair was nicely fixed and shone brightly under any light that was kind enough to touch it in the deep darkness that we were under. She had a very pretty face that was oval in shape and nurtured a pointed nose with a sweet smile bearing almost-white teeth. Her skin was beautiful, fresh and fair all through. She was also quite tall for a lady and her tight-fitting outfit, which was sexy as fuck gummed her body and accentuated sexy and highly tempting curves. Now these curves were indeed luscious and thanks to that very sexy pair of ‘jeggings’ that she wore, it was easy to tell that she was endowed with fat hips and a big thick ass. Oh how hunger overwhelmed me just then! The pure hunger of lust….the hunger for her body…the hunger to sink my teeth into her big butt cheeks and chew on some hot fresh yansh….the hunger to have her on top of me and watch her hips vibrate while riding away on me like I was her personal ‘Okada’…..that pure hunger….that pure lustful hunger!…….*sigh*. I suddenly became a bit jealous of T. Money as she stopped in front of him first and threw her arms freely around his neck while pressing her slim, sexy body against his. I knew she must have sighted the keys to the Range in his palm. Bitches and their attraction to material possessions ehn???......*shaking ma head*
CHAI! But wait o! You mean say nanana I don compose five pages already??? DAMN! This story must get Part 2 o! Shooo! Infact e be like say e go get Part 3 sef because tori still plenty….lolz. On the real though, I’ma have to continue this in another post. I’m sure you don’t mind, do you? Don’t worry. I’ma have Part 2 up in good time. Thanks for your understanding……*smile*
Till later then! Thanks for reading.
Yours truly,
That Bloody Pervert
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