Monday, October 8, 2012

Tell Yo’ Cunt That I’m Coming Home.

Wasup you? Hiyu been? Great I hope. You bet I’m fly as ever. You know, I received a phone call yesterday and it got me seriously missing the little time that I spent in Lagos. I really do wish I could just speed up this academic program of mine and move on to greater things. You know?….like becoming a celebrity blogger and all...(Now don’t you dare mock me in laughter ‘cos dreams do fucking come true).

Anyway, as I was saying, I received a phone call from one Tokunbo girl like that. She’s a hot chick indeed and she’s also a student of Unilag. She works part time too though, hustling on the streets of Ikeja at night time……lolz. Truth though is, I don’t really give a fuck about that. All I know is that she is one good hell of a fuck.

We met in a club actually. She came with a couple of her girlfriends to have a girls’ night of fun but as fate would have it, there ended up being some masculine intrusion. As soon as she and her crew trooped in, she sighted my male companion aka homeboy and dashed towards him. He quickly got up to receive her hug when she was close enough and I heard her yell “Oh my! Now who ever imagined I‘d run into you here???”. I later got to understand that they had first met during a ‘Business Transaction’ at her school. Now don’t go asking me what that transaction was all about. It’s none of my business and certainly none of yours as well…..*straight face*

After hugs were exchanged, Tokunbo introduced her girlfriends to both of us while my hommie introduced me in return. Though all four ladies joined our table, Tokunbo confessed she and her buddies really didn’t plan on entertaining any male company that night, saying it was meant to be a strict girls’ night-out for them. However, they also didn’t expect to have a member of their crew run into an old acquaintance and I quickly summed that up as one of life’s many surprises/complications.

I’m so glad my buddy and I went to the club well prepared that night because damn!.....we spent more money on these bunch of hoes than we did on ourselves. You know women nau? Na ‘oshofree’ dey always worry dem. They ordered expensive liquor, the most expensive bong and some packs of cigarettes, which they smoked like chimneys. I fought hard within myself not to be irritated and a lifeline later came to cheer me up when my pal drew closer, nudged me and whispered into my ear “O boy! Today seems to be your lucky day o! Tokunbo just pinged me that you’re cute” he chuckled as he finished saying that and nudged me again.

“Really?” I asked. I then tried to gaze at her to find out if she actually did catch my fancy but just when I made that decision of mine, my eyes started playing tricks on me. I then realised I had had more than enough stout to drink and I gave up trying to take-in Tokunbo’s bodily features. “Er..okay. she’s alright” I finished telling him, knowing fully well that I had no idea what I was talking about.

It wasn’t until we all got up to swing and sway to the melodious tunes from the disc jockey that I confirmed Tokunbo truly did admire me. As soon as we hit the dance floor, she achieved some initial formality by dancing first with my hommie to a single track before, like BAM! She was in front of me; throwing all that her momma gave her at my poor helpless self. My buddy didn’t seem to mind losing her on the dance floor though. He occupied himself with one of Tokunbo’s girlfriends and I caught him from time to time, pressing and squeezing on her own booty.

At about 3am, I was fucking exhausted. So was my friend who asked me “Dude, I’m fed up with this place mayne! Can’t dance no more” to which I nodded and replied “Me too dawg!”. Tokunbo seemed to agree with us but that was then my buddy and I realised 2 of her friends had suddenly gone AWOL on our asses. Damn! It must have been during the time that we got jiggy on the dance floor. Tokunbo didn’t seem to be in the least bothered though. “Don’t worry guys, ma gurls can easily fend for themselves. I’m sure they left for the next club on the other street or something” she dropped casually and without any iota of panic.

Well, we didn’t choose to argue with her because we very well knew she knew her friends better than we did. We therefore decided to split and left the club for my pal’s crib; Tokunbo’s arm in mine and her companion’s in my buddy’s, but not before settling our ‘gbese’ (bill) though.

Not more than 20 minutes did we spend on our trip because the road was fucking free at that time of the day. Because we were all so drunk as fuck, we wasted no time in picking rooms once home and inside. We didn’t even bid one another good night or anything. Like I said……we were fucking wasted.

Tokunbo pounced on the bed just when we got into the room and I followed suit, only that rather than jump on the bed, I jumped on her. She burst out in laughter when I landed on her huge boobs and rubbed the back of my neck. I took that as a ‘better-do-what-you-gotta-do-before-I-fucking-pass-out-on-yo-ass’ sign and made for her own neck. I kissed, licked and nibbled on that soft piece of flesh below her face a little and then moved my lips upwards unto hers. Chai! The regret I felt just then when she parted her own lips open. Her mouth reeked off stale tobacco and that almost tempted me to throw up. I swallowed hard though and only kissed her for about 6 seconds before I immediately went back to her neck while slipping a hand inside her blouse to caress her protruding boobies.

“Oooh!” Tokunbo moaned and I was convinced my ‘handsmanship’ was satisfactory. I decided to take her pleasure up a notch and moved my lips to her bosom while gently pulling down her top a little just below her neckline for me to behold a red bra concealing two nodes of hard black nipples. Pulling down the bra as well, I attacked both her nipples and the firm, fresh flesh surrounding them with my mouth. Tokunbo kept on moaning lightly for a while before tilting her head upwards to tongue-tease my left ear in appreciation. Shit felt really good so I decided to give her a treat and further increase her ecstasy. While I sucked on her boobies, I slipped my hand into her pant and felt some encouraging wetness. Tokunbo then gasped in pure pleasure as I made two of my fingers steadily go in and out of her already soaked pussy.

After a brief while, she could no longer control herself and in a flash, got up to fully undress and reveal a body carrying very sexy curves. I got up as well but only ended up revealing 6 inches of hard dick…..Lolz. Tokunbo gave an evil smile as she saw Mr. P and signalled me to come to her. She pushed me hard onto the bed right after and mounted me, using her left hand to ease me gently inside her. Her sweet-ass vagina ended up lubricating and creaming my stick of pleasure as she jerked and bounced on me mouthing-off “Oooh!...Yessss!…Gosh!…..This dick is sweet!….Oh I love your dick!….Ooooh!…..Aaaaaah!.

We both came hard after a few minutes and Tokunbo cuddled against me and kissed my forehead before we both passed-out. Even though she left early with her friend the following morning, she came back visiting three more good times for some more awesome fuckery.

Now about the phone-call ehn? You see, after those four memorable times that I fucked Tokunbo’s tight-ass and sweet-ass pussy, school came calling and I had to return to I.B City. Since I’ve been in school, Tokunbo and I have exchanged phone-calls many times and she never fails to remind me of how much she misses me. I once told her to come visiting but she says her mum won’t let her leave Lagos. I simply had to tell her we would just have to wait till I journeyed down there again.

It was only yesterday that she called me to intimate me of her birthday. She told me her birthday comes up tomorrow and her perfect gift from me would be to show up at her party and treat her to some birthday sex. When I apologised that I just couldn’t make it over, she broke into a song; a raw remix of Total’s ‘Sitting Home Waiting’……………………………..

I’ve been sitting home waiting for you
Staring at this cunt is all I do
I try my best to be good to you
But you’re never around when I’m in the mood.


I was like “Oh gosh! I’m so sorry baby! Do try and understand. I’ll be home soon. You know Sallah is around the corner huh?”. Tokunbo however didn’t want to accept that response o! She started becoming difficult on the phone saying “Ohhhh nau! Joor nau! Don’t you know this cunt has missed you so much? What do you expect me to do with my cunt nau???” I knew just then that I had to reply with my own raw remix of ‘Coming Home’ by Diddy’s Dirty Money……………………..

I’m coming home
I’m coming home
Tell yo’ cunt that I’m coming home
Soon I’ll let my cane wash away, all your konji of yesterday
I know it’s plain hard to wait
But please forgive all my mistakes
See I’m coming home
I’m coming home
SO TELL YO’ CUNT THAT I’M COMING…….HOME!!!








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